How to stop being stubborn?

Are you trying as much as you can to stop being stubborn but you can’t help it? It is very hard sometimes to take changeable advice and criticism. However, there are no two ways that being stubborn is immensely common and happens with a lot of people as they have it in their attitude. Everyone has to be stubborn and defensive in their life at least once. You are not alone! For that matter, some people have the trait of being stubborn very dominant in their personality. A stubborn person will always cling to the decision they have decided no matter what happens.

Stubborn people are driven by their own instincts most of their life. And of course, sticking to your ground is not at all a bad thing. Being determined and single minded is absolutely fine but not at the cost of ignoring someone else’s opinions, ideas and thoughts. Not adapting to the situation and the attitude can be disastrous sometimes. So how can you know that you have the traits of being stubborn and defensive in your personality? If you have a desire to react to any and every situation, you can be considered to be stubborn. Also, if the situation needs a flexible personality and you are not able to adapt and change according to the demands, you are probably stubborn and defensive. People who are extremely stubborn are also often called with the terms like ‘rigid,' ‘hard headed’ or ‘set in their ways.' Let us dive in some ways you can follow to change this ‘not so good’ habit.

The trait of being stubborn is not a habit sometimes; it is rather a way of life in most of the cases. Like a bad habit, it can also be overcome with investing a little patience and time. There are efficient and productive ways to do it. Those ways will not only help you to become ‘open-minded’ but also will improve your social presence. You can certainly find a balance between keeping your instinct intact and still be positive and relaxed. Rather than thinking that you will have to compromise a lot of your personality, think what the situation requires to become more relaxed and adaptive.

There is a session developed by the psychologists that are called ‘an audio hypnosis.' It will help you to master the quality of listening instead of becoming a slave of your own stubborn streak. If you will relax and listen to the audio therapy repeatedly, you will notice changes gradually within yourself.

(Image Courtesy: Gregory Wright, DDS)

• The experiences you will have will enhance your deep thoughts and feelings that will calm your stubbornness down. Since you have positive thoughts around you, that will change the entire perspective towards everything in your life. These are trance sessions which will improve introspection.

• The session will help you to become a good listener rather than try and become the central speaker every time you are around people. You will automatically see that you now try and hear everyone and then create your own opinion. Listening to everything around you will also enable you to get a new idea and form a perspective about various things. There will be hundreds of thing unfolding in front of you as by only talking and not listening to anyone around; you will ultimately end up in having just one idea that you already had. You won’t be able to gain more ideas, and that could probably make you change your own opinion about certain things.

• Of course, listening to others will expand the territories of your intelligence and brain to improve your skills. By having this session, you are taking your emotional and mental intelligence to a higher and improved level. Slowly and steadily, you will see that change in your attitude is visible and observable by everybody.

• The session will also allow you to see things clearly without any biased glass. Earlier you probably would not be able to take someone else’s advice or opinion because of your stubborn attitude. You can now grasp other people’s perspective easily now and have a wider range of thoughts and mindset. Seeing things with a wider lens is accessible now.

• As we discussed above as well, the social presence will improve as soon as you divert your lifestyle into a flexible manner. This session will exactly do the same to you. If you were the kind of person who avoided listening to other, it would help you to change your attitude into a more flexible one. The conversation with people will become more like a mutually beneficial interaction.

• A change in lifestyle will bring a lot of different impacts in your life including the positive approach towards everything. You will see and stay in more and more positive environment around you. Since you have the capability to listen to other people, they will want to interact more with you with an active streak. This will affect your perspective, and you will achieve a happier and stable approach.

(Image Courtesy: Power of Positivity)

Apart from the session, there is a need to know how you can treat this habit yourself. If you are will to change then, you will be firm in taking your decision forward and actually practice the things which will positively enhance your life. Taking charge of your own habit and working on it takes a little conscious effort but will lead you to a more brighter and happier lifestyle.

#1. Practical Approach

So the term itself is a very broad one. It includes every possible aspect of life and the approach one needs to follow to become more practical. The first most important thing is to listen to the other side of the story. You must know how does feel to be in the same shoe as someone else is. Before disagreeing with a thought or idea try to know the reason behind it. Maintaining a good eye contact will help to concentrate on the person’s talk. Definitely, do not interrupt anyone while talking. If you carry different opinion about that particular thought, just let that person finish and then speak your mind out.

Also, you need to remind yourself time and again that it is not necessary for you to be right all the time. You are allowed and entitled to have a personalized opinion, but if you expect the others to have the same that’s not where you should be heading. No one likes a “know-it-all.” So try and maintain a mutual conversation rather than being imposed on your belief.

You should try and build up some confidence in other people. Allow people to do the work you feel is right for them to do. Every time they will be successful, your confidence in them will grow gradually. Keeping an open minded perspective will also ensure less judgment. Avoid jumping into negative conclusion way too fast. Have a motivating spirit and use that in every situation. Considering others efforts will also keep the practical approach intact. Try to be humble and grateful for the accomplishment that got because of others. A modest opinion of yourself will help you over an inflated one. This will ensure that the stubbornness decreases. Though don’t restrict yourself in anything. Where you are fighting for your rights, you need to have a stubborn attitude. Stubbornness can help you in several ways, so keep that in you where needed.

#2. Develop Negotiation Skills

Always focus on building a rapport that can lessen your tensions. Do not use your stubbornness to get what you want. It will not take you anywhere. Work on your negotiation skills and apparently it will be effective in bringing change in your stubborn nature. Follow the essentials of cooperating, compromise and collaborate. Try and find common ground with other’s opinions. Divert your mind into resolutions and not misunderstanding. If you do not understand the things that anyone is discussing, say it. Make yourself clear that you did not get what they said or implied. That will lessen misunderstandings. Also, don’t hesitate to apologize where you need to. This will build legitimate support always to have a hold over your position. Negotiation should always conclude. The agreements should be celebrated and facilitated. Even if you’re struggling to negotiate with some, always try and acknowledge his willingness to find a solution. Allow the other person and yourself time to think and process the potential outcomes you may have.

#3. Analyze Your Stubbornness

Introspection is the key to change. Make yourself flexible enough to explore and identify the reasons of your stubbornness. The reasons of one’s stubbornness vary from the other person. So introspect and know the losses you are taking just because of your defensive and stubborn nature. This will make sure that you are aware of the consequences of your actions so that you can improve yourself accordingly. Ask yourself the reasons why you don’t give up on being the best. Thinking yourself to be always right is the root of stubbornness. From insecurity to anxiety anything can be the reason. However, it is important for you to know what is wrong. Determine what is that you are gaining of being stubborn. If it is working against you, that should change it immediately. Examine the flaws and work on it. If you are struggling, also ask for help. By working positively, you can create an unshackled life that you want to live.

We hope that these things will help you to deal with your stubbornness and see through a better and improved lifestyle. To share your own views comment down below.

(Featured Image Courtesy: Mom Junction)