It is not an easy task being a parent as your love for your child can often compromise the way you discipline your child, and it can make them a brat or just very disobedient. It is necessary that as a parent you set a limit for your indulgence so that your child can do things without your help. If you raise a child, who comes back crying every time things don’t go like they expected them to you will not be able to live your life the way you plan to.
Parents don’t like to be harsh on their kids as most kids cry when they are spoken to in a harsh tone or receive a loud scolding, and the heart of every parent is soft for their child. All parents can easily fall in a particular region be it that of overindulgence or indifference as there is a thin line between them, so they need to set ground rules and even make lists that clearly points out where they did not give love and where they gave too much of it.
#1. Be Clear
One of the most governed things about kids is what is that you want to feed your kid or does your kid even check with you before eating as he/she is still discovering food and can get a little too excited over a particular thing and doesn’t know that consuming it too much will not be good. You cannot possibly be there every time they eat something although you will have to be till they are not old enough to follow instructions so what you need to do is sit your child down and with the help of before and after pictures tell them what will happen if they consume too much of anything. This clarity is necessary for helping your child understand what is good and what is bad.
#2. Be Strict When You Need To Be
It is quite often that you see a lot of parents yelling and shouting at their children over what they have done, and it is they who have permitted them to do so because children take even silence as consent, so you need to be vocal and strict when it comes to discipline. It is common that your child resorts to begging when he/ she cannot get over the current obsession of putting the toy car in his/ her mouth so what you need to do is take it away and tell them a firm no if they plead or beg. It could be that they suddenly burst into tears; you should not harden yourself so much that you are immune to your child crying hard so what you need to do is distract them with something else so that they don’t keep thinking that they have lost something which they have dearly loved.
#3. Teach them the Power of Negotiation
This may be too soon to teach your baby, but it can be one of the best lessons as all through his/ her adult life your child will have to use the power of negotiation because people don’t just give you what you want and you have to take it. You don’t have to go into the harsh realities of situations and describe how mean people can get as nature has left this tincture of blood that all men would be tyrants if they could. Giving them your car key and taking away their soft toy and then only getting your car key when your child gets the soft toy is a lesson in possession which will hold your child in good stead and make him/ her think about always thinking about what is it that others want so that they can get what they want from them as others will only give what they want to them when they get something which they want. The faster your child learns that he/ she needs to do to convince others to get what he/she wants from them the more he/she will work towards that and the less he/she will whine whenever someone troubles him/her.
#4. Create Balance between Work and Play
Creating a balance between work and play is essential, and only you can help your child balance work and play. Studies have shown that if you help your child balance it early on your child can live without the stress that can trigger from playing too much or working too much. A strong work ethic coupled with a good way to relax which your child can always bank upon will help them stay at a level where they are always one step ahead of stress and have that extra hour which gives them the edge to focus on things which can trouble them if they don’t take the measures to avoid the incoming problem. This is one of the most trusted ways of not spoiling your kids.
#5. Help Develop their Coping Skills
Spoilt children have no coping skills because whatever they have wished they have got it and they have not earned it which makes them a rare type who have all the resources at their disposal and still go for more as they get easily bored with things they have achieved with little or no work at all. It is important that your child learns from disappointment as no one can live the kind of life which is free from all emotional stress and this will make your kid come to your for advice and compassion. You need to raise kids with an iron will and tell them that both success and failure are not permanent and you are proud of them as they make constant efforts in a direction to succeed. This will lift their self-esteem in times of failure and keep their ego in check when they are high on success.
Tell us ways in which you do not spoil your child. Drop comments in the comments section below.