Turning someone down is not easy because the world is full of jilted lovers isn’t it? Some people turn down the ones who approach them on the premise of courtship real fast while others don’t agree to the relationship nor do they say no. The problem arises when you feel that you are in a relationship or with a person out of guilt and not love and this is always problematic. The reason it is because you think if you tell them, no you will ruin the relationship you have, but you should not try to salvage what you don’t want in your life as it bears nothing else but agony.
Every day we come across advances made at us and make a few ourselves which get turned down and this only happens because in that particular moment we don’t want to do what others are interested in at that point in time or it could also be that we don’t want to spend time with that person at all and this is often the case as your nature can only compromise for someone you deeply love and care for, and that is also the kind of compromise that doesn’t take a lot out of your nature.
#1. Plan it
Partners even the calmest ones out there will overreact when they are being told that you don’t want to continue the relationship anymore. It may come as a shock to them and they may feel betrayed even when they have shown the maturity that comes with the knowledge that nothing is permanent in this world and people lose touch with old feelings all the time so what you need to do is plan where you are going to tell them that it’s all over. It should be a place that is not too crowded but at the same time should have a few people as you never know what your partner may think of something crazy if they are alone with you at this hour of emotional stress.
#2. Make Sure To Do It in Person
It is essential that you do it in person and not over phone or text as that can make the person furious over not what you are saying but how you are saying. If you are afraid that the reason which you are giving your partner will not be well received by them, then that is not right attitude because this fear will only increase when you send what you want to say and then shun yourself from them. It can have bigger manifestations when you start avoiding places where you think your partner can be and put in the frame of mind where you want to hide. Be brave and handle what is thrown your way you will soon arrive at the position where it will be clear that does your partner’s plea melt your heart or does it confirm that the difference is irreconcilable?
#3. Take Full Ownership
Sometimes you are so involved with the person that they cannot picture their life without you and don’t buy what you are saying because you have said it a million times before so what you need to do is tell them that you need some time off to figure yourself out and that will appease them. This will help them adjust their expectations from you and make them better prepared for the final blow where you tell them that it’s really not working out. During this time it may not come as a surprise to you that they may show signs of moving on and the word break had just saved you a lot.
#4. Re-examine Your State of Mind
What is it? Is it just another day where the predictability of life is boring you to the core, and you are too fed up with things because you visualized yourself climbing the top faster than you are doing and you are thinking that your killer instinct has been compromised because you are giving time to everyone and everything and not putting all your hours into work? Or is it that you have convinced yourself that you want to live a workaholic life and the whole concept of relationship is demeaning to you? It is possible that you can slip in such a state of mind when things are not going well and you cannot even think on important things in such a state let alone make important decisions. Ask yourself why you are thinking negatively and then get to the root of the problem? If your partner is pressurizing you about something or you are sick of your duty take a break and refresh yourself. If there is trouble still then you need to just politely tell your partner that you cannot reconnect with the happiness that they once gave you and after all the nothing can take away from the truth of the world that people use other people and when they feel they have used them up or cannot get any more use out from them they know it’s time to go. This will impart the knowledge that world is like this and give you the opportunity to end things amicably. Your partner may even object to this philosophy and present other philosophies giving you a reason to deliberate upon your decision which will be the deciding moment.
Tell us how you let someone down easy. Drop comments in the comment section below.