As parents, it is often difficult to explain certain things to your children, especially when they are really young and do not have the maturity to understand the significance of various things in life. It is because of this that we generally find young children, mostly the ones that are in school, talking back to their parents and not willing to follow the instructions given by them. What is essential to keep in mind is the fact that children have the urge to disobey their parents at most times and that is because of two crucial reasons.
Firstly they are not mature enough, and that is the reason the parents take all the decisions on behalf of them. Due to this most of the times, they have to do all those things that they have not chosen to do. They have to engage in activities that are not of their choice constantly; they have to follow the time schedule determined by their parents, they have to obey all the instructions given by their parents. This is what makes them rebellious, and we find them not willing to follow the instructions given by the parents and talking back to them.
Secondly, this is that stage where they are developing various aspects of their personality and are learning about new things in life. It is because of this, there is often a clash between the opinion of the parents and that of the child. The child wants to do all those things that they perceive to be amazing according to their ability to evaluate and the parents will always wish for the child to do all those things that they think are going to be the best for them. There is a clash between the opinion of the parents and the wishes of the child. This is why we often find them talking back to their parents.
For the parents, it generally is all about doing the best for their children, and that involves making sure they turn out to be good individuals who have a set of values that they follow in their life. Talking back to their elders is certainly not what they will want their children to develop as a habit. This is why parents often do all that is possible for them to make sure that they do not encourage this kind of behavior of their children.
If you have been facing the challenge of your children talking back at all times and not willing to listen to the instructions that you give them, here are the things that you can do to make sure that your child does not talk back to you.
#1. Make Things Clear To Them
You need to keep in mind the fact that it is okay for children to express their opinion this will help them to develop their decision making power. But, it is very crucial for you to make sure you make it clear to them where they will need to draw the line. It is not yet the time for them to make all the decisions of life and they need to understand the fact that they will have to adhere to some of the rules and the regulations you set for them. They will have to learn the fact that they will have to follow the discipline that they are taught to do, and at many times it is essential for them to do as instructed by their parents.
While it is important for them to make some small decisions and to develop the ability to judge various situations in life, it is equally important for them to know the fact that they are not capable enough to make all the decisions of their life. This is the reason they will need to take into account the recommendations and opinion of their parents. They will need to understand the fact that it is not a good idea to talk back to their parents because that is only going to make the situation worse. It is important for the parents to clarify the limit to various things for the children. They will need to make it absolutely clear the idea that it is not good to argue on topics that they are completely mature enough to take a decision regarding.
#2. Do Things In A Friendly Way
It is essential for the parents to understand the fact that children tend to become more aggressive and talk back to you when you are trying to exhibit too much control over their lives or even over them in general. It is very crucial that you make it a point to deal with them in a much friendlier manner and not keep trying to exercise control over them. You need to make it a point to let them know the fact that all the things you are asking them to do and suggesting are for their greater good and it is going to be the best thing for them to follow.
A friendly manner will make sure that the child is not feeling negative about the instructions that you will want them to follow. It will also make sure that you are not choosing to impose things on them and are willing to make sure that advice them and guide them. The way you choose to communicate with anyone makes sure whether they are going to follow your instructions or not. If the tone is rude and unpleasant, then your children will also not want to obey you.
#3. Keep Your Cool
It is very important that you keep your calm when your children talk back at you. You need to understand that fact that screaming at them and being rude at that moment will make things worse. You need to be calm and make sure that you are maintaining your cool when it comes to interacting with your child. You will have to explain the fact to them in such a way that they are able to understand the importance of listening to you and making sure that you have explained your point to them.
At that point of time when your child refuses to listen to you, if you decide to be rude and scream at them, if you are not able to control your anger, you will surely make them unhappy, and there is a possibility that they might turn rebellious. This is the reason you will have to keep yourself really calm and make sure you tackle the situation gracefully.
Your child may not have to maturity to handle themselves properly and the tactfully, because they are children it is the responsibility of the parents to make sure they do not make the situation worse. It is dependent on the behavior of the parents in this case, how they are going to make sure the child is controlled and taught the importance of behaving properly with their parents.
#4. Explain What Is Correct?
It will be a great thing if you can explain to your children the behavior that is acceptable and what you are expecting from them. It is always a good idea to make sure that you correctly and clearly explain things to your child. It will be a good thing for them as they will know where they went wrong and what they need to do in order to make sure that they are behaving properly. As children, they are not aware of what is correct and what is not, they are not able to evaluate before they exhibit a certain kind of behavior. But, once you tend to let them know what is correct clearly, there is a possibility that your children will be able to understand what is expected of them.
You need to keep in mind the fact that as children, they are not good at making decisions. The first thing that comes to their mind is the way they tend to react. This is the reason that when you tell them what is correct, they will be able to react in that way and keep your instructions in mind. When you do not tell them what is right and what behavior is wrong, they will react in the way they have been doing for all this while. But, in case you feel they need to be informed about a certain kind of negative behavior, and you do that. It gives some direction to them.
Do you find it impossible to handle your kids and they are often talking back to you? Do you find it impossible to explain the importance of listening to parents to your child? Is your child hugely rebellious? Do you think this article is going to help you to deal with the miss behavior of your children? Please comment in the box below and let us know your opinion on this article and its use.
24 Opinions
5 Opinions
Well we all are well aware of the fact that children always have the bad habit of talking back to their parents and do so very frequently. But, when we discuss this matter there is one thing that I feel remains ignored at most times. We all tend to forget the fact that children do not at all time talk back because they wish to go against the wishes of their parents and do not wish to be obey them, but they often tend to do so because they have to keep following the instructions of their parents and elders at all times.
We as adults tend to find it impossible to follow the instructions of most people who hold authority over us and do not wish to be told what is to be done and what not to do. As children they have to keep following the instructions of their elders at all times and that is the reason why they tend to get annoyed when they are not given the opportunity to follow their wishes. This does not mean that you will allow your child to take all the decisions, they are surely not mature enough to do so. But, also the fact that you need to understand what they feel and approach the situation according to their understanding.
Please keep in mind the fact that you child will become more rebellious if you do not make it a point to keep your temper in control. You will make them feel like you are compelling them to do things that are not what they like to do. That is the reason why you will need to make sure that you are approaching them in a different way that is more appealing and is not controlling.
The reason why children talk back is because the y fell they are being compelled to do things that they do not wish to do and they do not see you have to obey the rules and the instructions set by any other individual. They are not aware of the fact that they are not mature enough to take those decisions and do not understand that fact that you always mean well.
The best thing to do in order to make it a point to explain to them clearly what is expected of them and what is it that they can do to make sure they are behaving the way that is acceptably by all. They are not aware of most things and that is the reason they will need to learn things from you and will have to be told what is correct.
You need to tackle this matter in such a way that all that that they need to learn what is told to them and at the same time they do not feel like you are trying to impose things on them. This needs to be done really tactfully and sensitively.