The Stop Street Harassment commissioned a national survey of 2000 people in the USA in the year 2014 which found that 65% of all women had experienced street harassment. 23% of them had been sexually touched, 20% were followed and the rest 2% were forced to be sexual. Another research by iHollaback and Cornell University reported that 84% of women have been catcalled by the time they reach the age of 17 and 13% are exposed to catcalling by the age of 10. What do all these stats speak?
Harassment on streets has become so common around the world. Teasing, catcalling, groping in public and stalking are some ways people harass men and women. When a woman crosses a street, hundreds of people watch her, but some people make obnoxious comments on how they look. Some people believe that these comments are compliments, but they do not understand that it is very disrespectful for a woman. No woman or man enjoys comments that are sexual in nature. These calls are offensive and why won’t they be? Why would anybody listen to what some stranger has to say about them or thinks about them? Actually, these comments are made from the perspective that the person will get an opportunity to get sexual with the person they comment about. These people will never be successful and yet they keep trying. The most common form of harassment is catcalling. Before we delve into what exactly is catcalling, let's look at a classic example to understand the situation!
As an expression of disapproval against catcalling, one brave woman Noa Jansma, a design student in Netherlands, took a step forward to bring the issue of catcalling , which many believed does not exist, by clicking selfies with those men who catcalled her over the span of a month long. This woman was shaken after a classroom discussion revealed that almost all women in her class were being catcalled on a daily basis. While the men in her class did not believe that this still happens , she decided to show the world how catcalling is still a problem for women and uploaded the pictures with the catcallers with a flat face on her Instagram account @dearcatcallers “to create awareness about the objectification of women in daily life”.
So, now that we know catcallers do exist, let's really understand what the term means and how to deal with such people!
A catcall is a loud whistle or a comment of sexual nature. Comments like “baby,” “princess,” making kissing sounds, singing songs are catcalling. A woman is stared at and men make vulgar signs that disrespect a woman. Men feel entitled to comment on a woman’s body. They think they own the woman’s body and by making such unacceptable comments, they think they can get closer. A woman is never asked about how she feels about this and women bear this treatment almost every day and all day long at work, on the streets, and in the public transports. A woman cannot feel safe traveling alone or walk alone even around the corner of their houses. A woman should feel safe around men, but it is not so. Times have changed, and such men have become more encouraged because women do not protest most of the times.
Women usually feel that the person will make a comment and stop or they may never see the person again, but they do not understand the severity of the situation. A lot of times catcalling turns into stalking and abusing. Women must not ignore these situations as ignoring only makes the woman more depressed and self-conscious. The life of a female is extremely disturbed when such incidents take place in her life. It is very hard for a woman to forget if a man catcalls one day but if the woman listens to these every day then she will not be able to lead a normal life anymore. Thoughts about those comments and the man who harasses her will occupy her mind all day and night. She will be scared all the way to her home. In some cases, women stopped leaving their homes in fear that the man may stalk her and reach her home. Even if women do leave, they go out by changing routes. They are ready to take the longer route if that saves her from those catcallers.
Do you think this is right? Do you think women deserve this? A lot of times women fail to recognize catcalls. Some women are heard telling other women that they should not be disgusted because the man complimented her. So, how do you identify a catcall?
The catcall makes a woman feel uncomfortable. A compliment makes a woman feel confident. Catcalls are usually sexual remarks that make a woman feel conscious and uncomfortable. A person violates a woman’s privacy by making such comments. Those comments are dehumanizing, sexist and racist. One can easily make out that they are being catcalled.
The person tries to invade your personal space to speak to you. A person who has to compliment you does not have to get too close to you but if they get too close to make a remark then it is a catcall.
Such men want power over you. They will make comments as if they own you or they have right over you. They feel dominating when they state their opinion, and you silently follow them. For example, a man commented on the tights you were wearing one day. Will you wear it again knowing that the person would be there waiting to make another nasty comment about you? No, you will not. When you comply with what the harasser had said, you are actually allowing the person to have control over you.
If you find a person staring at you and you find them every day at the same time, then you know that something may be fishy. The person may be trying to stalk you, or they may gradually start harassing you.
Every woman must know the difference between a compliment and a catcall. Observe the signs and protect yourself from these people. You will never know when catcalling may turn into harassment and abuse. Stay alert!
Men are able to harass women because they are ensured that a woman will not revert aggressively. We know it can be dangerous to retaliate violently because you do not know how powerful the person may be or if they may be carrying some weapon. You cannot risk your life in any case. Unless women learn the right way to handle such disturbing elements in the society, catcalling will never stop.
#1. Don’t Be The Rose, Be The Thorn.
When a man catcalls you, the first thing you can do is to be quick. Wittily reply to the harasser quickly or repeat their comment loudly. If you are in a public space then repeating their comment loudly will make the public aware that you are being harassed. This will turn down the man who was trying to harass you. Don’t be a sensitive person. Be loud and bold enough to face the person without fear.
#2. Reject The Idea
You can reject the idea of your harasser by telling them that you are not interested or you feel disrespected. You should tell the person to stay away and that nobody likes the way people like them approach. It is always a better idea to speak rather than being mum about it. If the person knows that you are not interested, then they may not try again.
#3. Drama Classes At Work
If you have ever taken some drama classes in school or your college, then make the most of those classes today. Make weird expressions that show your disapproval, like rolling your eyes or looking weirdly at the person. Until you show your rejection, the person will keep on trying, and the more he tries, the more encouraged he will feel to take the next step. Bring out the actor inside you and use all of your disgust regarding the person to show it on your face.
#4. “How Nice Of You”
You can say thank you to the person who is making comments about your appearance. Catcalling does not mean that the person will only praise you. The person may make negative comments about you as a sign of disapproval. What you can do in this condition is to be polite and say thank you. The person will be surprised by your attitude and will probably shut their mouth.
#5. Contact Authorities
If you feel that a person is stalking you, then you should contact the authorities. Contact the police and if you are in a public transport then contact the authority in charge. Gathering help from these people is the best thing you will do to keep yourself safe. When the person finds out that you have taken help from the police, the harasser will stop stalking you. If you do not want to take help from police, then you can wave to a police person as if you know them. The harasser will think that you know the police officer and he can be in danger.
#6. Carry Your Arms
If you are not around a place where you can find help, then you should carry weapons with you every time you go out. By weapons, I do not mean that you carry a gun. Well, you may carry an authorized gun if you have a threat. You can carry things that are sharp and can help you protect yourself till some help reaches you. You can carry pepper sprays or anything that can stop the person in case you are alone most of the times. Even if you are not alone, you should carry these things in your bag so that you can help any other person in need.
If you have had such experiences, then you can share your views with us in the comments section below.
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