How to Apologize & Say Sorry?

An apology is a regretful acknowledgment of an offense or failure. We ask for apologies when we make a mistake that hurts the sentiments of another person. Mistakes are an integral part of learning. A person who has made some mistake shows that the person has tried to gain an experience from something which is out of his/her comfort zone. Experiences help you gain knowledge and some life lessons. But that does not mean that mistakes are good because they teach you something. 

Some mistakes may give you a lesson, but some may take away something from you. Some mistakes are bound in certain situations that you cannot control. Like you may stumble upon something and hurt someone by falling in the middle of a seminar full of people because you were nervous around them. You were made fun of, but the person you hurt unintentionally will not understand your situation. They will just think about how you fell on them. 

Everybody makes a mistake as nobody is perfect. From a small kid to an old person everyone is subjected to making mistakes. Nevertheless, mistakes can be risky as you could be responsible for your and other person’s loss. Did you ever make a mistake for which you had to pay a huge price? Did you hurt someone for what they have not forgiven you?

 A few mistakes are irreversible, and you cannot probably make up for them or change them, but you can surely apologize. It depends on your mistake and your way of apologizing that will decide whether they will forgive you or not. If you say sorry without meaning it, then that sorry will never get you forgiveness. Do not even think of getting into a fight with the person just because you think that it was not your fault. It is a humanitarian act to apologize even if the mistake was committed unconsciously. You will prove yourself to be a better person if you keep such small things in mind. 

So, let us get down to the business. Do you want to know how to apologize and say sorry? Do you want to know how to apologize appropriately? Following are the different ways to apologize to someone:

#1. Express Regret

Whenever you make a mistake, the first thing you can do is express regret. Tell the person that you regret of having done or said something that you should not have. When you express regret, make sure you look like you feel that way. Go ahead with an apology only if you really feel bad about your mistake. Do not make the mistake of apologizing through a text message. The important thing is that you ask for forgiveness face to face. 

If you do not meet and apologize, it will give the impression that you are not serious about your apology. The process of the apology should be verbal. You should go through the whole process if you want to get effective forgiveness. If the person does not find you interested or serious about the apology they will not even consider listening to you any further. So, be smart and do not make the mistake of looking jolly in a grim situation. You can of course try and lighten the situation by making a few jokes but only after you have asked for an apology.

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#2. Explanation

After you have expressed your regret to the person, it is time to explain what went wrong. Explain the entire situation that made you do or say what you did. Tell them that the situations were such that you had to do it or you did it unknowingly. Tell the person that you had no intentions of hurting them and that the mistake has hurt you as well. You had to pay the price, and you are paying one because the person is hurt. Try not making another comment that may hurt the person again or else it will be impossible for you to get an apology ever. Avoid lying or exaggerating the intensity of the situation because this will only create a bigger problem for you if the person comes to know the truth. And if the person catches you red-handed then your impression will be spoiled not just in front of them but everyone. You will surely not get an apology from anyone in that case.

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#3. Acknowledging/ Accept

When you have explained your situation to the person, you should now accept your mistake. Show the person that you accept your mistake and you acknowledge the fact that you have hurt them. While a lot of people do not accept their mistakes, be the bigger person and apologize even if you feel it wasn’t something huge. Acceptance will help you in life wherever you go whatever you do because when we learn to accept things we grow over things that can stop us from moving ahead. 

It is important for the person to know that you have hurt them for which you take the full responsibility. If the person knows that you care about their feelings and that it hurts you to see someone hurt, then there are chances that the person will consider your apology thinking that you are a genuine person who cares about other people.

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#4. Apologize

After showing your regret, having explained the scenario and acknowledging your mistake finally, it is time to ask for an apology. This is the right time to say sorry to the person you have hurt because now they will be prepared to hear your apology. During the whole process maintain an eye contact with the person you want to apologize to so that they can see in your eyes your honesty and that you mean it. 

Whenever you apologize, make sure that you are really guilty and you want an apology because unless you mean it the person will not be able to connect with you and then the apology will not be granted.

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#5. Promise

Now that you have apologized, it is time to make a promise to the person that you will never repeat the mistake. You should ensure that the person is assured that you will never repeat the mistake. The person should feel secure that you will not hurt their feelings in the future and only then the person will forgive you.

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#6. Restitution

A promise has been made, but you should not break it. Now that the person is almost on the verge of forgiving you, shoot your last arrow and tell them that you want to compensate for your wrongdoing. Take them out for lunch or give them a gift that they could use. You can also invite the person for dinner at home so that you get to spend the time with them. When you spend time with them, the person will get to know more about you, and probably they will understand that your mistake was actually unintentional. Mend what you have broken.

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