How to choose the right life partner? It would not be fair to say that choosing a right life partner is easy. It depends on the one looking for a life partner. We all have some dreams since our nascent stage regarding the person we will spend our lives with. Some wish for a good-looking partner and some wish for an intelligent one. The definition of a perfect partner is totally subjective and we cannot judge the definition of other people. But there are some basic things that we must all take care of when choosing the right life partner.
What should be the basis of our decision? Should the partner be attractive? Should the partner be extremely wise? Does appearance or smartness really matter? What should be some qualities that every partner consists of? The answer to these questions is based on what kind of relationship you want. Every relationship needs some efforts that have to be made consistently by both the partners for it to work successfully. A marriage is full of compromises and adjustments and if you think that you or your potential partner has the ability to adapt to your life choices and vice versa, then you should go ahead with this person. Life partner is someone who is going to be with your forever. When you give commitment, it implies that you agree to spend your entire life with the person in good times and bad, for richer, for poorer, in health and in sickness. Your partner should be someone who understands you and protects you, someone who guides and criticises you and does not judge you in any situation throughout life. Obviously, your partner expects the same from you so when you choose your partner, make sure that you are ready to be on someone’s side till death parts you. So, how should one choose the right life-partner? Following are some tips to keep in mind while choosing the right life partner.
#1. Discover Yourself First
A person who wants to find the right life partner needs to be aware of themselves first. To decide what you want in your life partner, you should know what are your requirements. You should be aware of the type of personality you have and when you know what kind of person you are, only then you will be able to decide what kind of person will be best compatible with you. If you are a grave person who is serious all the time, you will enjoy the company of a person who is fun-loving and jolly. You must be wondering why would you like the company of a person contrary to your personality type. Usually, people who are poles apart get attracted easily and we feel that in order to create a balance, the partners should be a little different from each other. If both the partners will be serious in their life, then how will they enjoy their life? If one partner will be a little care-free, the other will be able to gradually pick and learn the same attitude towards life. Our soul mates make us perfect by teaching us some lessons and by taking some in return.
#2. Determine The Ideal Partner
If you know yourself inside out then, you know what you require in your life. You will know what is that you miss in your life. Write down all that you demand from your life and how can your partner offer to help you. Mention the qualities that you desire in your life partner and start searching for those qualities in your partner. But nobody is perfect. You are not perfect and therefore, do not expect all the qualities you listed down from your partner. There will only be a few of those qualities that your partner will possess. Do not hunt for someone who is perfect in everything because nobody is made such. Look for those virtues that will make your life simpler. A person who is patient, resilient, determined, courageous, honest and committed is an ideal partner for anyone. If a person endows patience, then they can go through any problem without panicking. A person who is determined will not give up on you or on the relationship. These principles in a person are the most important aspects for a long-term relationship.
#3. Choose Love Over Lust
There are possibilities that you feel attracted to the potential partner. You may sense a chemistry with the person, but that is not enough. You may confuse yourself with lust and love. Lust is purely sexual while love is much deeper. Love is a strong connection that you build gradually with a person. It makes you a better person overall. You learn a lot from the person you love, but when it comes to lust, you just get into a shallow pit of relationship. It will not last long if there is just sexual intimacy and no feelings attached. Try to sketch out the dissimilarity between love and lust in your relationship with the person so that you do not end up making a mistake that can hurt you for a lifetime. The other person may not understand the difference as well, so it would be better if you talk it out with the person. You can save two lives by making one wise decisions.
#4. Run A Background Check
You should do the background of the person you are considering because family, career and criminal history are vital for your knowledge. What if you fall in love with a person who has had criminal records? The person may repeat those crimes even after you make them your life partner. You should check their profiles on social media and know who all are their friends. Contact their friends to know more about the person. Does their image and character mirror their looks? When you will talk to their friends or family, you will get a lot of information about their personal life as well. A study from Associated Press and the Journal of Marital and Family Therapy says that 22% of men have admitted to cheating at least once during their marriage. It also further states that a person who has cheated once has 350% chances of cheating again than those who haven’t. It is very important to check if the partner had been in any relationship before and what was the reason for the relationship to end. You should be careful before choosing the right life partner.
#5. Think About Your Future With Them
The best way to know if you have found the fair partner is to sit quietly and imagine your life with the person. Imagine incidents that are full of happiness and full of despair. When you will imagine such incidents, then you will automatically think about how your partner will react. If you find that they can support you in all the moments of life, then you should give them a chance. But if you find a discrepancy in what you expected and how they behaved, then you should reconsider seeing them. When you spend time with someone, you will automatically know how they will react in a specific situation. You should feel warm visualizing them in your future, but if you don’t, then you have a clear answer right in front of you.
#6. Check Your Compatibility With The Potential Partner
You should check how compatible you are with the person. If you know everything about them and you do not keep secrets from each other, then you are compatible. You both share same interests and hobbies which makes you more comfortable with each other. If you have same likes and dislikes, then you will feel more attracted towards them. You will like spending time with each other, and you are so agreeable with each other that you will solve each other’s problems effortlessly. You can be yourself with your partner as you do not have to worry about being judged.
#7. Spend Enough Time Before The Final Decision
If you want to know someone closely, then the best way would be to spend time with them. Spend as much time as you can so that you get to know about everything related to them. You cannot know about a person through a few meetings and texts. When you meet them in-person, it is then you will realize how they react and what ticks them off. Their attitude and their perspective towards life and people will be known when you have random chats. The more time you spend with the person, the more you will build trust. You will notice their poor habits and correct ones too. Though you cannot know a person inside out, you can have an idea about them. You can get hints if they are hiding something which cannot be seen through text messages. When you meet a person, your intuition will inform you if they are the right life partner for you or not. Take your decision cautiously.
What are the qualities that you think a right life partner should possess? Write your views to us through the comments section below.
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