Rebekka and Randy Hauskins, just like any other pregnant couple was eagerly awaiting the arrival of their baby Hayden Ruth in 2010 which would have completed their family, but life took another turn.
Hayden was pronounced stillborn on July 6, 2010, at 32 weeks due to an umbilical cord accident. The entire incident filled the lives of the parents with grief and sorrow. Rebekka says that the death of their child changed the course of her life forever. “Hearing the nurse and doctor say, your baby has no heartbeat is just the heaviest sentence you could ever hear. I just remember at one point saying to my husband, ‘I just want to die.’ It’s just so painful”.
As parents of a stillborn, their lives completely changed. One can never go back, and hence the couple has had their pre-Hayden and post-Hayden days. She says that tragedies like these change the direction of how we do things. It changes your perspective on everything.
In Happy Valley, Oregon, the couple started working towards coping with Hayden’s death by making monthly payments on the $1,000 hospital bill post delivering their deceased daughter.
Growing through the pain of monthly reminders, Rebekka and Randy have set out to make sure that the other parents who too have experienced the pain of giving birth to stillborn babies don’t have to worry about the hospital bill that follows such a heartbreaking death.
In January 2011, the couple founded Hayden’s Helping Hands, a non-profit organization that pays off families’ bills from stillborn deliveries. Till now, they have covered the costs for 44 families, amounting to over $40,000.
About the organization, Rebekka shares that “What caused us to want to do the foundation and to create this legacy for [Hayden] was really the love that you have for a child. As a parent, all you want to do is to raise healthy, strong children and there’s so much love that’s involved in being a parent. We didn’t want her little life to be in vain.” She adds, “Randy and I are able to show other families that this is the most horrible time of your life, but you will not be alone. There are no words that we can say to help them and make their pain go away … [but] it’s not something that they have to walk through alone. People acknowledge that they have a baby. We honor her by including her as one of our children and not going through our lives trying to imagine that she doesn’t exist. We always spend Hayden’s birthday with [Josie and Madison] and Hayden has always been part of our conversation. Not in a sad or dreary kind of way, because there’s a lot of positives that we can take away from it and teach our children.”
And that’s how Randy and Rebekka see their own lives. Our deepest sympathies go out for Randy and Rebekka and their lovely kids. We sincerely hope that God gives them the peace they seek for.
Do you think that what Randy and Rebekka did was thought-provoking? Would you like to contribute to the society in any such ways? Do you feel inspired by Randy and Rebekka's contribution? Please share your thoughts in the comment section below. We look forward to your replies.
