How to Help your Child cope with Cliques?

1,419 Views Updated: 22 Mar 2018
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How to Help your Child cope with Cliques?

Schooling is the most fun part of every student’s life until they are not bullied. School cliques are a common issue and are formed at every level. Be it your school, college or even workplace; cliques are everywhere.

Clique is a bunch of bullies who group together to take everybody’s case. These social "cliques" are very influential in the adolescent life of your child and affects their development.

People who are part of these cliques are perceived as a threat to other kids who are not a part of it. Cliques are often said to be social groups of friends who exhibit peer pressure on their members and dominance over non-members.

You as a parent need to be concerned if your child is part of any such cliques or is being bullied by one. Bullying in childhood affects the mental development of your child, and therefore it is important that you address the issue with them.

Signs That Your Child Is Being Targeted By A Group Of People

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Cliques is a common practice in schools. One often comes across school cliques who wish to rule the entire school. They are always on the hunt for weak and timid students who get scared off easily. If your child is being bullied and is not able to tell you about, here’s how you can know it yourself.

If he/she comes back from school with some unexplainable injuries, things are definitely not right, If they are not able to concentrate in their studies and have shown low performance or have started to be alone or are losing out on friends, it means there is something wrong. Other indicators are if he/she has started displaying self-destructive behavior or feels helpless due to low self-esteem, you must understand that your child is being bullied at school.

Many a time, bullying takes a toll on the child's mental and physical health. If he/she has suddenly started to skip meals or binge eating, are having difficulties in sleeping due to frequent nightmares or if they have lost or destroyed their books, clothes or electronics, you should be concerned and talk to them about it.

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How To Help Your Child Cope With Cliques?

As parents, the biggest help you can do is to show them empathy. Help your child understand that there are a lot of other people they can be friends with, so as to avoid getting involved with the cliques. Remind them that there are a variety of different people in their school who can make great friends.

Recommend: Is Your Child a Bully?

If you think that your child is being bullied, it is important that you get involved. In fact, you can get other parents involved too and work with them to discuss and move forward. On an individual level, you should focus on your child and help them in moving forward.

#1. Practice What You Preach

Practice your own advice and be aware of how your actions might affect the kids.

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#2. Teach The Right Things

Always be careful of what you teach them; both in words and behavior. You teach them to be scared, they’ll be scared. You teach them to be bold, they’ll be bold.

#3. Get Support From Teachers

It is a possible scenario that you are not able to help your kid in fixing their problems in schools. You can at least help them by listening and understanding their problems. For others support, you can always ask the teachers to help. The teachers can talk to your child as well the kids of the clique to stop bullying. She might even find some success in encouraging friendship amongst them.

#4. Role Playing

If you or your child find it difficult to talk about bullying, you can always try role-playing. You can create situations of being a bully and threatening your child. They will definitely react and will let you know how they feel about it. If your child is not able to stand up to a bully, teach them to be assertive, the bullies usually retreat in such situations.

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#5. Write It Down

As parents, you can make your kid write down all the ways they can handle bullies at school. The list can include points like ignoring the clique, talking to a teacher about it and snapping at the bullies with your group of friends. Make sure that your child has a group of friends who are like-minded. Being surrounded by friends will help him/her to stay strong and fight back the bullies. Making friends will definitely help.

#6. Teach Them Independence And Resilience

While you might be able to help your kid when they are in the house, you won’t be around in the school. Teach your kid to be independent and resilient to school cliques. They are just a bunch of bullies who can be shooed away with the right temper.

#7. Document The Actions

You can ask your kid to document the behavior of the bullies in their notebook so that you can know what exactly goes around in the school. Once you are aware of it, you’ll be able to provide them with better solutions. You can also meet with their teachers and discuss the matter.

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#8. Confront The Bully

Well, this one’s not our first recommendation, but could be your last resort. If your kid’s still being bullied, just confront the clique yourself. Talk to them and tell them to stop behaving inappropriately. You can make them understand that such behavior is unacceptable and they need to stop doing it.

How To Break Cliques?

Teaching clique breaking activities to put an end to bullying is equal parts important as teaching your child about the ways to deal with them.

Every parent has a different perception of finding solutions. While some believe that it is better to ignore and stay away from the bullies, others believe that the best way is to befriend your enemies. Yes, you can suggest your child break the clique and be friends with them. A clique is nothing but a group of friends who gang up to dominate and bully others.

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Instead of being a part of the clique, you can teach your child to break it by using these simple techniques.

#1. Use Appropriate Language

When you try to enter and break through a clique, make sure that you use your words wisely. Do not talk about things that promote their clique, instead talk on an individual level. Try to make them understand their individual perspectives on things. This will help them to think apart from their ‘group’.

#2. Get Your Hands On The Head

Every group or clique has a boss or the most influential member, to whom everybody agrees to. Making friends with them will ensure your security against any bullying.

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While you teach them to break the cliques, it is also important that you educate them to not form one themselves. Having their own set of friends who stand by them whenever needed is all your child requires for a memorable school journey.

Do you have any more ideas that can help kids to deal with school cliques? Share some with us!

(Image Courtesy: 1. Education, 2. Daily Mail, 3. Industry Analysts, 4. Understood, 5. Great Schools, 6. Anti-Bullying Blog, 7. News; Family Education (Featured Image Courtesy)

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