Every person who is in his or her forties must have already gone through a lot of experiences, faced several complicated situations and solved them successfully. All of us undergo a phase of doubt and self-questioning once in a while and the more we become unsure of ourselves, the more we hesitate to do something out of the box. You must have enjoyed a lot in your 20’s. A person is not obliged to commit, be it a career or partner in his or her 20s and can explore many possible opportunities.
However, the situation does not remain the same as you grow up. Several obstacles come underway and one has to figure out the pros and cons of everything before taking a step further. Moreover, the phase of exploring things get over when you are in your forties and you think of settling down when it comes to career or relationships. You are over 40 but want to date someone. That calls for a complicated situation. Your younger self was charming and lively. But when you are over 40, dating becomes a whole new challenge as you have to brace yourself up and convince that you are not too old to love and deserve warmth and affection of a partner in your life.
#1. Boost Your Self-Esteem
If you feel that you are too old for love, then you need to work on your self-esteem. It is never a good idea to form a negative outlook towards yourself. Such a perception can cause a lot of damage and deprive you of possible opportunities. Never think that you are not worthy of love and affection. Do not harbor feelings of contempt and regret for having thought of finding love in the forties. Age hardly acts as a barrier when it comes to love. Appreciate what you have, work on your self-confidence and look forward to new avenues.
#2. Abandon Your Pursuit Of Perfection
Some people could never find a partner for themselves as their idea of a perfect partner is not realistic. They imagine their soulmate to be a perfect person without any flaws. This demand for perfection is difficult to meet as once we develop a critical mindset, we actively search for elements to reject the other person. We forget that we also have flaws and shortcomings. You should always remember that perfection is a temporary state. One can never really find a perfect partner for himself or herself yet can find a partner with whom one can create perfect moments.
#3. Browse Online
You may not be a tech-savvy, but online dating doesn’t require you to be well-versed in the digital world. Many dating sites can help you to get the date you have wanted for long. You can browse the Internet, register yourself in a dating site and get the ball rolling. The best part of online dating sites is you can pick people who have the same interest as yours. Isn't that perfect?
#4. Flirt
You need to establish eye contact and hold that gaze for a while before the make or break moment is revealed. A lot of people become chronically serious when they cross the age of forty. They forget the fun-loving, carefree person they used to be. Don't feel that you are not good looking anymore only because you are in your forties. Be confident about your looks and flirt with a style. Talk, express and forget the numbers. Age does not matter as long as you still are a humorous man who knows the rules of flirting.
#5. Be Open To Commitment
All adults have experienced betrayal at one point or another, be it love or business. They must have also maintained a distance from people who they didn't find lucrative from both financial and emotional angles. Such episodes are incorporated into our psyche and can result to fear of commitment as we start believing that people will betray us sooner or later. Do not forget that you always have the power to let go and eliminate the bad experiences from your life. Never fear to commit. Always be open to commitment.
#6. Smile
You need to have an inviting smile on your face at all times. If you can’t do that, a crooked grin can also work to attract people towards you. People are more likely to fall for people who smile, not just once in a while but quite frequently. Let that curve be on your face, always.
#7. Chuck The Past
You may have a lot of emotional baggage from your previous relationships if you are over 40. You were in love with someone, but that person didn't reciprocate your love, your date ditched you, you could never propose your date and so on and so forth. All these situations have been detrimental in shaping your personality and behavior. However, you should not open up about the past on your first few dates. The person who is meeting you for the first time might not be very interested in listening to your songs of suffering. He or she will be more inclined towards you if you have some lively stories and interesting anecdotes to share.
#8. Seek Help
You must be having some friends who can find a suitable match for you or may know someone they can set a date with and feel. Never hesitate to ask your friends a favor. The best introduction about you can be provided by a person who is close to you and brush aside feelings of embarrassment and humiliation. This way the person who is coming on the date will also be already aware of who he or she is coming to see. This can make things more comfortable between two of you.
#9. Make A List
Make a list of people you have dated in the past and pin down the qualities which set you off so that you don’t make the same mistake twice. Making a mistake once is forgivable but repeating the same mistake over and over again is idiotic and exhausting. There are greater chances of success when you know who you can be compatible with, what kind of qualities attract you etc.
#10. Be Patient
This may seem as bizarre advice as you have already spent a lot of time being patient and have not rushed a decision. But this is something you have to remind yourself again and again. Be patient, let the love come to you and see what life has to offer. Let things take time but do not lose hope. Be patient.
Share the difficulties you faced when you approached your prospective partner. Comment in the comments section below, if you like this article. We look forward to your replies.
(Image Courtesy: 1. Pinterest, 2. Grasshopper, 3. Huffington Post, 4. Orange Country; Great Dating Tips(Featured Image Courtesy)
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