The demise of a person you love is a situation we all have to experience during the course of our lifetime on varied occasions. Although, many lives are changed when they experience such a loss, but it does not have to persist for a very long time. The ability to deal with such grief positively shows your ability to continue with your life for the better.
We all are well aware of the difficulties it follows to find the right support and words when you lose the love of your life. It is perplexing to seek out for a sound conversation with a friend who is experiencing grief. Not just that, it is tough to compose yourself when you are the one who’s facing a difficult time.
Every individual has its own way of coping up with intense sorrow and demise of somebody they love. There have been many studies iterating that individuals learn to recover from a loss of their own as time passes by, depending upon their healthy habits and social support. There is a no such defined period for anybody to grieve.
Let us look at some other ways to get over losing the love of your life:
#1. Try To Be Vocal
The time you lose somebody you love, it is tough to cope up with your day to day operations and at times you require somebody from whom you can seek help. It is generally your responsibility to tell people what you require, and as a matter of fact, you may not know what you would require at that time. But support is required to overcome the grim situation. There is one effective way to overcome this phase that not many are familiarized with, is through online help by searching for forums online and varied communities. So, you should know that hearing out the stories of individuals going through a process of similar fashion can give out a big help to you in processing your emotions.
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#2. Celebrate The Lives Of The People Who Died
If you don’t wish to vanish the peace of the deceased souls up in heaven and are trying to cope up with the loss of the person you love, then you could do a lot of things to celebrate their lives and remember them. Their remembrance activities could include donating something to charity which was their favorite, frame photos of fun times with them, giving a family name to a new born or you could even plant a garden in their memory. It is your choice what activity you want to take up in remembrance of the dead one. If you feel stuck with your emotions, then it will be beneficial for you to have a word with a psychologist or professionally trained individual who can give you enough support to help you handle your emotions and get you back on the path.
#3. Remain Open
We, humans, have a tendency to look for reasons and varied explanations when we feel hurt. We presume that we don’t hold a right to feel this way and it’s a humongous problem. We start searching for a specific reason. Blaming oneself or anything for a matter of fact does not ease the pain in any way. The problem lies in three beliefs that tie us in a conflicting relationship with the world that means reality, with self and other. Just understand attaching yourself to any of the causes makes you stubborn and not open to changes that must be lingering near you.
#4. Be Strong And Help Other People
This is a very strong piece of advice which can do wonders to you if taken into serious consideration. Learn to be strong when the tough times strike you and make the world find out how it feels to be strong. When you have others suffering in mind too, your suffering tends to soften and ease out. Also, developing contact with others suffering gets us in contact with the sufferings of the people in the universe. You must remember, everybody goes through this phase so help someone to share their pain and ease out yours.
#5. New Memories
Try creating some new memories. Avoid visiting places you have been to with that person and try out some new interesting places to have some fun. Even if you wish to revisit the same place, don’t go alone and rather try going out with some new people to create some refreshing new memories. Also, grab a bite of foods you have never tasted before. You could also try out varied sports like skydiving, climbing on the rocks, bungee jumping and so forth. Do you know if you try to create new fresh memories, you will fetch a better chance of easing the pain inside you and you, might discover innumerable new things that you are capable of doing and which you never thought you could do?
#6. Grieving Is Also Vital
Sometimes, grieving is also important to come in touch with the reality. It is more than just mere feelings. It will show up in your thinking. It might be tough for you to believe that the person has died and also you might find it tough to lay concentration on other things or you might just lay focus on how that person died. Physical responses such as tightness in the throat, stomach upset, restlessness and so on are evident while following the process of grieving. You should understand it is good only for a short span. Grieving is just to keep you in touch with the real world and most importantly reality. People who grieve generally like to spend time alone and at times they put themselves in isolated and quiet places because of the safety they get to witness there or sometimes it is an also a process of waving people away.
#7. Taking Care of Self
We all want our deceased people to stay happy in their afterlife. At least, we try to presume that they would be if they see us happy. So take care of yourself and your needs in the best possible manner. Do not even try to neglect your basic needs such as to eat, to exercise, to get adequate sleep and so on. Give yourself a sound break from housework and visit a spa or something to pamper yourself. Just be good to yourself. If you really wish to see them happy and sound, then you got to do some simple things! Life is simple only if you try to make it that way.
#8. Give Yourself Some Healing Time
You should also know that there is not any magical clock developing pressure on you to get over the person who just died. Nobody is forcing you to get over the hurt and anger by the end of next week, month or next year. Bear this in mind that you are allowed to take as much time you like to heal up your wounds.
Never think you soon have to attain normality because that is not going to happen. Also, the pain you have inside you will never fade away, but it’s okay to feel like that. Also, you must know, you feel stronger than you ever have been in life so you would feel capable of doing things you had never given a thought to before.
You definitely are not expected to display perfection. Also, your experiences make you tougher and unique. Never feel guilty about your past. Never forget that the decision to initiate your healing process is in your hands. So whenever you feel that you are ready, take one special chance to seek for peace and past the pain.
#9. Adjust To The Environment
You know that the person who died held an exceptional place in your heart and your family. Nothing can replace him or her. But you can definitely try adjusting yourself to the absence of the person who faced death. The process might involve interactions with people such as family and friends who are surviving. Seeing you in a depressed state won’t make them any happier. So try to smile at least for their happiness. What is gone is gone and can never come back but learn to deal with people who are with you in reality. What say?
#10. Building Faith Yet Again
You know that the loss of the person you loved immensely can take a toll on your beliefs and faith. So, in that case, speaking with a counselor or a priest could help you to deal with your loss since they are experienced in healing people with inevitable losses. Although the sadness still remains there, it is not draining and does not occur all the time. You can remember them whenever you want but don’t let one unfortunate incident shake up your beliefs and faith. Let them develop again slowly and steadily.
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