Feeling neglected in a relationship sucks big time. It is a great deal when someone you admire so much, without any reason, just bumps into your mental peace and complicates your relationship dynamics. But, communicating with accuracy and working together as a team gets the relationship in place. It brings about a positive change to build a stronger and lasting bond.
But, how can you do so when you are being neglected by your partner? How can you actually fix the issues present within your relationship? Therefore, we are here to help you get out of the dilemma and get your romantic festivity back on track.
The primary essence of every relationship is to provide companionship. It focuses on meeting each other's needs along with satisfying those pertaining to the self. But, certain preoccupations can easily interfere with our availability patterns. Neglect is one thing that arises under such circumstances. It is a relationship wrecker. It is a feeling like no other. It is worse than being hated by someone.
Basically, neglect is a frustrating and disappointing phase to deal with. It directs the relationship into a dangerous place. One of the partners is not being treated by the other in an acceptable manner. In fact, they aren't even a focal point of the other one's attention. Reasons can be several but outcome remains the same- ignoring the relationship and companion. Instead of maintaining a strong connection, the ignorant partner focuses more on their personal requirements. He/ she isn't involved in what it would take to correct the relationship status. They will be more into their possessions - work, addiction, infidelity, abuse, lack of expressiveness, criticizing behavior, short-tempered attitude, perfectionist approach, manipulation and/ or selfishness. But, each of our problems can be used as important life lessons. And you can effectively cope with such negative situations.
No one gets into a relationship just to be neglected by their partner. But when you really feel so, here is what you can do in order to get back that attention and deal with being neglected.
#1. Do Not Jump To Conclusion
The human mind simply retains information under stress to distribute into extreme categories - white or black, good or bad, right or wrong. However, most of the reality occurs in grayscale. Generalizations based on instant assumptions are what we make. But, opening our minds first is the need of the hour. Therefore, before you jump onto any kind of conclusions, have a look at your own self. You never know, there might be an answer hidden in your attitude. When one starts to ignore you, it often starts with some of your actions that pissed them off. You must have done something to make them feel uncomfortable. And it is pretty natural to do so. We sometimes do not realize that there is a proper decorum to maintain even in romantic relationships. You just cannot opt for any particular way as per your preferences. It might just be a matter of time and/ or apology that you owe to your partner for the betterment of this relationship.
#2. Understand Their Perspective As Well
Do not just pay attention to your personal feelings. At times, it is also necessary to understand someone else's point of view. Because you might never know, the issue you are stressing about might just be your wishful thinking. His/ her lack of attention might have nothing to do with you or your relationship. So, try seeing things from the other side as well. Maybe they aren't feeling well, they might be stuck with work, or they are simply tired and feel that disconnect. So, it is very important for you to consider all sorts of possibilities before coming to a conclusion and throwing at them your particular view.
But, understanding and seeing things from your partner's perspective can happen only when you know them in and out. This way you can correctly respond to sensitivities. Interpreting actions into words will also become easier for you. Plus, it teaches you to respect the difference the two of you have. So, when you are feeling neglected, make sure there is enough consideration given before attacking your partner with any kind of accuses.
#3. Get Independent
You are madly and deeply in love with your partner. Now? You make sure that all his/ her demands are being fulfilled. You ensure their happiness is put in the first place. And you assume it is just your duty to make them feel successful, special and attractive. I feel good to know that you are supporting your partner pretty well. But, in this scenario, where is your happiness? Where are your own goals and purposes? Don’t you deserve to get in return the same amount of warmth and positivity? Take a break and realize that it is you who has to take care of yourself. No one is going to do that for you, no matter how close they are. You are responsible for the way you feel. It is only when you are possibly doing the best to meet your personal requirements that you will be able to discuss with your partner about their neglectful behavior and also not sound demanding or needy. That is how a relationship works!
Therefore, try to get yourself independent enough to not feel the pain when your partner is not available. Create your backup plan for times when they are away, and you have to be on your own. Hang out with your friends or immerse yourself into just any project. Divert your attention to the things that are most important in your life. Fulfill your priorities, and you are on a pretty wrong track if your partner is the only priority on your to-do list. This way, it becomes even more difficult to deal with neglect in the relationship. And that's something you shouldn't let happen. So, it is always better to carve a life that isn't dependent on someone else. This way, you keep yourself grounded and also have something, in particular, to keep you occupied. And you also save yourself from over thinking which again is an intense killer.
#4. Be Honest And Direct About How You Feel
Yes, if nothing works, then approach your partner directly and let them know how you feel about the situation. Confrontation is the best way for you to get past the circumstances. Come right out under the light and ask them the reason of such ignorance. At times, this act might just be unintentional. Your partner might have no clue that you are feeling neglected in the relationship. So, not only ask them questions but also seem curious to know what they have to say. In the name of confrontation, you do not have to get disrespectful. You are just there to find solutions to a problem. So, do not create any issues that might ruin the relationship even more. Get a control over your emotions and deal with the situation in a rational manner.
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#5. Bring Back The "Our" Time
Once you have figured it out that there is some issue arising in the relationship, start making efforts to carve out that "our" time in the everyday schedule. Make way for activities that can get your spark back. Go out for lunch or dinner in between the breaks or whenever you can. Or maybe opt for a weekend vacation. Just choose any activity that works best. Because as long as the two of you are spending time together, who cares whether you are just cuddling up at night or simply taking up calls during the day!
#6. Do Not Misinterpret
You don't have to kick out the important information that is being conveyed in between the lines. Never cook up your part of the story by taking things in a different stride altogether. Often times, we all misinterpret things that creates issues in a mjaority of relationships. Some people don't really know how to act when they are caught up in such situations or confrontations. He/ she might be asking for help and you are ignoring the fact. So, keep in mind that it is always positive enough to pause before retaliating in such circumstances. Differentiate the things you think to be true from the ones you merely assume. It helps you create better responses for the situation and avoid all sorts of misunderstandings. When you are aware of their intentions and the situation, you appreciate both the ends to reconnect in a way like no other.
#7. Forming A Support Group Is The Key
One way is to form a strong support group including your own friends and family. But, the other way is to also get in the good books of his/ her family. These are the people who will keep pushing your partner just for the sake of this relationship. After all, it is something that needs to be retained for a lifetime. And you will have to be in each other's life constantly. Moreover, the fact that those people love you who are also close to them, enlivens the required spark. You leave an impression that's really positive and also helps you get back the relationship that you thought was sinking.
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