If you are the nice guy, you often have trouble in making the first move when you get close to a girl. You become scared, having so many doubts in your mind when all you should be doing is getting all her attention on yourself. You often shy away from the moment when you should have stepped up your game and told the girl about your feelings. We are not saying that you force yourself to do so. But do not be scared of spoiling things. Besides what is the worst that can happen? She would end up saying "no" to you. But at least you would not be left stranded to think the "what ifs."
You should remember that rejection is not the worst thing in the world if it happens. There are a lot of people who got rejected on their first try, but they are happily in love with another person now. So make the first move on a girl without thinking much about it.But make sure that you do not come onto her too quickly or you will scare her away. Even worse, she will feel that you are a creepy or desperate person. So be careful that you correctly show your feelings. Here is why it is so important to make the first move:
The major reason that you should not just stop things at subtle hints is that she might not understand your hints at all. Despite the efforts that you are making, the girl might be in some other thoughts and will not know that you want to go out with her. So, you should make the first move and let her know directly that you like her and want to go out with her on a date. If you keep talking about random boring topics which do not go anywhere, she is not going to find you worth dating. You have to be an interesting guy and talk about things that interest her too.
Another reason that you need to make the first move is that, at times, girls want you to. Even if they notice all the hints that you have been giving, they will not respond to them unless you come up directly. Do not give up if she does not respond to your hints. She might just be acting dumb. So, make the first move and ask her out. Even if the girl wants to go out with you, she might be waiting for you to do the asking. So you would not want to miss the chance of going out with her just because none of you made the first move. Now that you know you should make the move, let us help you with some tips on how to make the first move.
#1. Make A Romantic Set Up
You have known the girl as a friend for some time but you want to take things a notch higher now. This is your chance to do things a little differently so that she notices what you are suggesting. Make things a little romantic when you decide to spend time with her. It could be a dinner at a rather romantic place or maybe you could go out for a movie with her. Keep dropping hints that you love to spend time with her when it is just the two of you. Or maybe suggest that this is sort of like a date and you would want to do it more often.
#2. Respond With Body Language
You should follow her body language and understand if she likes being with you. Watch out for that smile when you both are going out for a walk together. You should know that she likes being with you. You should smile back at her to let her know that you like her too. You can develop a bond with her through your actions only.
#3. Follow Up After You Meet
You should always get back to her after you have spent some good time together. You can let her know that you enjoyed the time with her and would love to repeat this in future. It will let her know about your feelings that you want things to move forward now. You can send her a simple text telling how it was for you, so she knows that you are very much interested in her. You can even mention some incident from the meeting that you loved. This will create a great topic for communication as well.
#4. Ask Her Out
If everything has gone the way you planned till now without any hesitation from her side. This is your cue to ask her out soon. Let her know that you would like to take her out. Let her take her time before she responds. Avoid being pushy here or you might scare her away. If she has loved your company till now, the chances are that she will have an affirmative answer for you. So if she takes time before she answers, let her have that.
#1. Take Things Slowly
So, what do you do if the girl you want to go out with is a shy person? She will not respond well to you being so direct about going on a date with her. So you have to take things a little slowly with her so that she can accept you and your company. You have to be patient when making the first move with her. Make comfortable conversations first. Once she is okay with that, you can start a little flirting. Take one thing at a time.
#2. Approach Her When Nobody Is Around
If you want to approach a shy girl, you should not do that in front of your friends. You should go and meet her all by yourself. Seeing a lot of people together might intimidate her. So avoid doing that. Make sure that there isn't anyone around and you both can have a good conversation. You have better chances of winning her heart if you consider her comfort zone.
#3. Give Her Some Time
She might not respond so quickly to flirting and other things like other girls. It might take her weeks or even months before she becomes okay with the idea of that. If you really like this girl, you should be willing to let her have that time before she opens up to you.
#4. Notice If She Likes It Or Not
You should keep a check on how she is reacting to your flirting in order to get an idea if she likes you back or not. You can try different ways of impressing her and see which one she finds the best. If she is blushing or stammering, that might mean that she likes you. She will open up to you and start joking herself in some time. On the other hand, she will not really respond if she does not like you.
#1. Give Her A Compliment
When you are trying to impress a girl without meeting in person, you have to make your texting game really strong. You have to assert to some ways while messaging her that make her respond well to your move. You should pay compliments to the girl you want to go out with. Girls love compliments. But make sure that you use genuine compliments and not just say random things to her. You can use flirtatious lines like,"I cannot take my mind off you." or "You were a constant thought in mind throughout the night". Anything that expresses your feelings in some good to hear words.
#2. Tease Her A Little
You can create some intimacy between both of you by giving her some funny nicknames that only you call her by. You can use some incident where she was a little silly to tease her about it later. You both will be laughing at it and you will create an amazing bonding with her this way. But make sure that you keep it subtle or she will be offended by your words. You will ruin your own game before opening all the cards.
#3. Share Naughty Thoughts
You should indulge in making some naughty comments and suggestions to the girl you want to go out with. Texting her will not be complete if you do not show your naughty side to her. If you are not sure how she would respond to something naughty, you can play safe and cunningly mention that you are just changing into your night suit. If she is into the game, she will reply back with something like,"I would like to see you doing that". You know how to take it forward after that.
#4. Be A Mushy Boy
You should especially emphasize your texts right before saying goodbye to her. Those words will stay in her head for some time. You could use some romantic lines or poetry to describe her and how she makes you feel. If you want her to fall for you, make her feel aroused by your words and let her want more out of you.
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10 Opinions
For some guys making the first move and asking a girl out is very easy. It is their inbuilt talent to approach a girl and impress them with their smooth words. But even the best of casanovas face a hard time to ask a girl out at times. So with an introvert guy like who had never been friends with girls in either school or college, it was a difficult task. I did not even know if I could manage a nice conversation with a girl. So impressing her was out of the question for me. I eventually got into a conversation with a group of boys who were discussing the same. They were all discussing their moves to impress a girl. Some were sharing their pet cheesy lines. Remember how Joey used the line "How you doin'?" whenever he saw a good looking girl that he wanted to date. It is so much similar to that. But admitted that this never worked on smart girls as they needed more than that to be impressed. That is where he failed. But I thought to myself that I could manage to impress her beyond that as well.
I got the confidence to do it for the first time. There was a girl I saw in the library every day. I know that she sees me too. She would hide her face behind the book when I noticed her looking at me. Clearly, she was too shy to come and talk to me. So, I decided to make the first move and ask her for coffee. Although I was sure she wanted to go out with me too but I was not sure how to approach her as she was not open to conversations like other girls are.
I really did follow the tips shared in this article as I found this really useful. I have been having a conversation with her every day now. I went ahead and asked her about her favorite author since I noticed her reading some fiction books. She was amazed by my question and without thinking much she went to share the answer with me. We had such an interesting conversation on the very first day and she was not the least bit shy when she started talking about such topics. She just needed the right company and she would be like any other girl. I like spending time with and we do it often these days thanks to this article. I am not going to take things fast with her since I know she is not ready to take this friendship forward. But we are already sort-of-dating as we go out for trips to the coffee shop with each other. She would share all her stories with me and we laugh together at the funny parts. I am glad I made the first move correctly and now I will keep going this way until she is okay with the whole dating idea. Just waiting to let her know about it.