What defines a relationship? And how do you know if you want to be with a person? Is it the money, the passion or the fame? Sometimes in a relationship, one person receives more love than the other. It can be anyhow, via showering your lover with gifts, loving him/ her more, giving them more attention than you receive, etc. When a partner is more successful than you, there is a possibility that you might start feeling insecure. This case especially applies to situations where the women in the relationship are more successful than the man. Without generalizing the fact that all guys have massive ego problems and cannot handle a woman more successful than them, some guys do find it hard to feel content with themselves in such a situation or a relationship. Since men are considered to be the stronger sex and expected to be the dominating one, when the female spouse turns out to be more successful, they tend to feel that they are not the stronger sex in the relationship anymore. Pertaining to the same reason, most men wouldn’t be up for dating a woman who is a lot more successful as compared to them! Another reason why people feel this way is that the society has instilled the expectations that they have from each gender into our minds, which we grew up believing in, without having a stand of our own. When these expectations are not met, people get concerned as to what the others might think of them!
When ego starts building in a relationship, that is when things start to take an ugly turn. A more successful partner does not necessarily mean that he or she is just financially stronger as compared to the other. It can mean that the other person may either be older, at a higher position in his career or work in a much-respected profession. These things can create a sense of domination, making the other person feel somewhat inferior, especially for a guy. Almost every guy wants to be in a relationship where he feels physically and financially strong, and the idea of a trophy- wife makes him repulse. Women being the apparent emotional creatures, a man can find it difficult to handle a stronger woman. But feelings for each other in a relationship is defined by how much the two people love and care for each other. Getting affected by a partner’s success is an issue that can be solved without having to end the relationship.
#1. Don’t Let It Get To Your Head!
It doesn’t matter if you are a feminist or just a guy who believes that men should have the upper hand in the relationship, but the worst way in which you can hamper your relationship is by letting your partner’s success get to your head in a bad way and start believing that you are inferior to them or don’t deserve them. They are with you for a reason, and it’s not money or fame, but for how much they love you and want to be with you. You have to understand that this is their career which they have made for themselves with their sheer hard work and experience. If you somehow feel inferior pertaining to this fact, work harder and keep a lookout for opportunities, so you can climb the ladder of success too!
#2. Be Content With Your Success
When both the people in a relationship are independent, self-sufficient, there is a chance that their incomes may vary. What you have to understand is that you are working in a position that you wanted to, have made a career in the field that you are passionate about and most importantly is the fact that money can’t buy happiness. It doesn’t matter how less you earn or how much more your partner makes in a month as compared to you or who pays for the dinner dates. These things don't define a relationship.
#3. Be Happy For Them
If you cannot be content with your position or how much you earn, be happy for them. Every time you start to think about the pay difference, just remember that they love you and you love them, and money matters must not affect your relationship. When a husband earns more, that money is still coming into the same house. When a wife earns more, the situation will not differ. Since they already know about how much you earn, remember that they still decided to be with you and that it doesn’t matter to them. If you can earn, spend and pamper yourself and are not financially dependant on anyone, be content. Your salary doesn’t define your worth, and your partner is not going to love you less for this matter.
#4. Let Them Inspire You
Get inspired by their accomplishments and start working on yourself and your career as well! If you are not content with where you are in your life right now, career-wise, take talk to them about how to get started or take their advice on how to reach where you want to be. Talking about these things will not make them think that they are superior in the relationship but in fact it will make them feel that you respect them and love them enough to not feel intimidated when you are with them.
#5. Don’t Let The Society’s Opinion Affect You
There are some expectations that the society has from each gender, and when those expectations aren’t met, people find it hard to accept you and start pointing fingers at your worth. The society’s judgment should not affect you if you are content with yourself and do not believe in generalizing. If you feel uncomfortable being in a relationship where your woman is more successful than you, then you must realize that you are feeling this just because you're a man. There have been some expectations from you as a man, and when people start questioning the matter, realize the fact that a person’s success is not defined by their gender, but their hard work and dedication.
#6. Let Go With The Unhealthy Jealousy
Jealousy in a relationship is only healthy when it is based in relation to a person. Jealousy based on the matters of money is definitely unhealthy as it makes the person think less of himself. When one of the people in a relationship starts feeling this way, it is bound to create differences in the future. If you feel this matter might be affecting you, talk to your partner about it and discuss the issues with them. Let them know how you feel. This way, you will also get to know their opinion on the subject in a better way.
#7. Be There For Them
If your partner keeps busy due to his job or due to whatever position he might be at, they will only feel loved if you are there for them, always. After a long day at work, your company is their happy place. Be it looking after the kids, parents or the house, help them in every way that you can to get the extra burden off their shoulders.
#8. Do Not Mistreat Their Success
Just because your partner is more financially secure than you, that is still no reason for you to treat them as your sugar daddy or sugar mama. Try to become a self-independent person who does not need other people to make payments for your expense, at least for the sake of your self- respect. You should only be with them if you genuinely like them or have feelings for them and not for their money. Treating them as your security bank and cash machine is like being with them for your selfish needs. If your relationship is based on materialism, then it will head nowhere in the future. Be a goal digger rather than being a gold digger!
#9. Start Believing In Gender Neutrality
Gender neutrality is an underrated issue where existence must be acknowledged by all. Having expectations or distinguishing a person’s worth and ability based on gender is not just irrational, but unaccepted. Gender neutrality defies these arguments. Discrimination based on sex is a think of passe! The notion of gender equality must not just be understood but accepted by all.
Money matters must not affect any situation where matters of the heart are involved. Feeling insecure from your partner can lead to a stressful time and even cause your relationship to end on an ugly note. Besides, always remember that no matter how successful or popular they are in their field, they have chosen to be with you for a reason which does not include money at all! So if it doesn’t affect them, it shouldn’t affect you either. Leave us a comment if you liked what you read!
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