I recently went to my child's school to collect his report card and was astonished to see the kind of grades he got in some subjects. Although I know he tried his best and gave his 100% but why am I still getting angry at him? How do I handle it? Should I yell at him or talk to him politely and address the issue. I am really confused. Can someone help me with this!
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Dear Readers,
Thank you for putting up this query. After considering all the facts and figures for this issue, we will try to answer this as efficiently as possible. It is very obvious that when your child comes back with a report card that has bad grades, you ought to feel bad and frustrated. However, losing your calm is not an option in such cases. Try to be as polite as possible. Let us see what all steps and measures can be taken.
#1. Ask Your Kid The Way How Grades Are Weighted Before Reacting
You need first to know the pattern how the teachers are making the grades. Some teachers have a different mode of grading, and some are totally different. Ask your child about the pattern so that you know where your kid needs improvement and where they are doing just fine as their grades may reflect the marks but the proper understanding of the subject will be told by your kid himself/herself.
#2. Reinforce Your Child For The Positives
You must be having something or the other on the report card which will be appreciating some of the things about your kid. You need to appreciate your kid for all those things. Of course, you are upset about their grades, but you can’t forget their achievements because of that. Also, kids are extremely sensitive.
#3. Talk To Your Kids About The Bad Grades Without Losing Your Temper
There is nothing wrong with talking to your kids about their grades in a polite manner even if they underperformed. Let them know that they haven't met your expectations and they need to improve themselves. Talk about all this but not in a humiliating tone but a motivating tone.
#4. Be A Good Listener And Try To Know their Perspectives
There may be some problem that your kid is facing, and that is making them not able to concentrate on their studies at all. Try to know the reasons behind their performance. Try to listen to them without pre-assuming things about them. They might have a good insight on this subject.
#5. Find Solutions To Improve The Grades For Future
This is the most practical option to react to such situation. Once a deed is done, it’s done. Therefore, rather than cribbing about the past, focus on the future. Look for the solution that can help your kids to perform better in future. Set a realistic goal for them and work upon it.
#6. Finally, Provide All The Support That Is Required
A job is not practically done before you actually make your child access those supports that you have planned for their improvement. Help your child to outline their time in order to improve them for the next time. Have your kid’s back in this whole time.
We hope that our advice was enough for you to find the solution for your problem. We will be looking forward to more exciting questions from your end.
Thank you,
Team AskOpinion
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I do not believe that parents should take the report card of their children too seriously as that is in no way the measure of how successful their child is going to be in future or what things he or she is going to accomplish. And a number on a piece of paper is not even a measure of their intelligence either. If they are not achieving good grades in school that does not mean that they are failing or will fail in every sphere of life. Maybe if they got a bad grade in mathematics, then maybe they are not interested in the subject and want to pursue a career in something else. Maybe they want to become a chef or study literature. It is understandable that you want your child to perform well at school but you should make sure that your son or daughter does not get overwhelmed by the pressure of your expectations. I think what you should do if your child has received a bad grade at school is that you talk to them, trying to make them understand that decent grades can help them in going ahead in career but be sure not to put too much pressure on them.
Parents usually have a lot of expectations when it comes to the grades of their children. They disregard the fact that every child has their own domain of expertise. Not every child will be good for studies. So, scolding them for scoring bad marks will only make things worse for them. you should be handling things in a better way even if your kid is not one of the toppers of their class. You should try to act in a positive manner even if you want them to work harder the next time. Try not to act disappointed went you see their bad report card as that will make them feel distressed about themselves. A bad grade does not necessarily mean that your child does not have a good future. It might simply mean that they might be good in other things than they with studies.
If they have a good grade on some other subject, you should not forget to mention that while going through the report card. Maybe they have scored an A in computers and they like that subject as compared to other subjects.
First, mention the good part and praise them for it. Then you should mention that they have a good bad grade on a particular subject. Ask them what problems they face in it so that you can suggest correct means to improve the grade.
Secondly, you can set up a meeting with the teacher so that you can know how your child performs in the class. You can ask the teacher to show the answer sheet so that you can see where the child needs improvement. Also, if you feel that the teacher has been unfair in marking, you can talk to them about it and ask for rechecking.
Thirdly, you should remember the important fact that even if your child is scoring a C in most of the subject does not make them bad at every other thing too. There are professions out there which do not need a good grade. They could become a professional artist, photographer, writer and earn so much more than the regular jobs.
So you should be careful of not grounding the child next time they score badly in their exams. Be a good parent and find something that they are good at. Let them choose their career on their own.