Should you accept your ex if he or she wants you back?

Breakups are bad, but not because you guys are not together anymore. Breakups are bad because they keep doubting your decisions.  After ending a relationship, you might find yourself questioning your decision. Do you feel if you should have given it one more try? But the very next moment, you're so convinced with your decision. The constant dilemma of "What if I took the wrong decision?" or "Have I made the right decision?" makes the time post-breakup even more compelling. So, if your ex wants to get back with you, but you're still stuck on the same question 'whether you should accept your ex if they want to get back with you or not?", this is the right place to be.

No one other than you yourself can give you a clear conscience on whether it would be good to get back to your ex or it won’t be. The harsh truth about such decision is, nothing is black and nothing is white here, everything is gray. It’s upon you to decide whether you want to see the gray as either black or white. Whatever you’re deciding, just makes sure you’re ready this time. And please avoid making it dramatic with constant breakups and patch ups. Be logical rather than emotional, it’s about getting back with your ex not riding a rollercoaster.

All said and done, if you still feel yourself stuck with the conundrum, below are some reasons to help you out reach upon a conclusion.    

Why You Should Get Back With Your Ex?

#1. Time Might Have Changed Them

Time changes everything. Time can change every big and small mistake or fault in our stars. Now, if time can fix all these things, there is a high probability that time has already changed your ex, and now she/he is the way you wanted them. Maybe you two broke up because you two needed some time apart to do some soul-searching and realize your mistakes, and now you're ready to get back together. So, if you believe that time can heal everything, you can get back with your ex.

#2. The Problem Was Fixable

Some relationships end because of very serious reasons which are hard as hell to fix. While certain others face the serious consequences like breakup due to the lack of understanding between the participants, citing the silliest reasons which could have been resolved with mutual discussion. If you feel the same, this is the time you two must realize that and get back together before one of the two find someone else. Any problem, whether big or small, can be fixed if people are willing to make things work. Love finds a way even in the most difficult times, so just trust yourself and resolve things if they want to get back again.

#3. You Both Are Smarter Now

As time passes, people get older and smarter. When you get mature you focus more on resolving your problems rather than exaggerating it unless one of the two gets pissed off and leaves. So, when you get older, you get smarter and you make attempts to retain people in your lives instead of going your own ways. Thus, assuming that time has taught you both your lessons, you can get back with your ex if you both want the same things. In the end, a story that ends well is a good story overall.

#4. You Two Were More Compatible

When you start dating someone post break up, you realize that things are not working well with your new found love. In short, the grass is not greener as compared to the grass you were used to previously. Compatibility plays a major role in making things work between two people in a relationship. A little of compatibility is necessary between two people, but if the parties involved are not compatible at all, there is no future of the relationship and ending it is the right thing to do. So, if you’ve been dating for long, post your breakup and you accept the fact that your ex was more compatible with you, you should do the right thing and get back to them. Try to make things work between you two if they too want the same thing.   

#5. You Both Deserve A Second Chance

“Sometimes, life gives you a second chance because maybe you weren't ready for the first time.”

If you feel like there was truly something that you both cannot create with someone else and things did not work out the previous time because it was not the right time, then maybe both of you deserve a second chance. Sometimes a second chance is necessary to make things work and you both believe that yourself. In fact, you both were happy when you were together and you miss that time. So, if life can give you second chance, why can’t you? Go for it if you feel giving yourself and your ex a second attempt, it is a better alternative than regretting not doing it later. Who knows the second chance turns into a magic.  

5 Reasons Why You Shouldn’t Get Back With Your Ex Even If They Want To

#1. You Broke For A Reason

Remember why the beautiful relationship couldn’t survive the heat in the first place? The chances are, the temperature might increase, and your relationship will tremble again throwing you in the middle of nowhere. It’s very common among people, few weeks after a serious breakup and we start feeling the loss of what we had when we were in the relationship. This nostalgia often misleads and makes us crave for the sugar and spice surface feelings, and we start yearning for the romance and compatibility. We deliberately keep ignoring the inevitable long-term needs from the relationship like stability, understanding, and commitment from the relationship.

You might be feeling like getting back with your ex and giving her a second chance, but that’s not going to give you any happiness because the problem might still be there and they might cheat again, if they cheated on you in the first place.

#2. You’ll Breakup Again  

If you broke up once, you will do it again. If you were seriously in love with your partner, you wouldn’t have let them go in the first place. But you did let them go, and that makes it clear that you are good, with or without them. So, rather than trying and meeting the same fate again, stopping yourself from getting back in the same situation would be better.

#3. The Jealousy Will Make Things Worse  

If your ex wants to get back with you after a gap, there are chances that they realized their mistake after being with someone else and getting a knack of this piece of information won’t be easy for you to digest. You may deny it in the first place, but you can’t hide from the jealousy that is killing you from inside. Your ex is with you, but they were with someone else before they came back to you. This fact might make you feel like a piece of furniture which is being used because the previous one was no good. Being an option for someone hurts the most, and you being one will keep bugging you the entire time. So, if you know she/he has been with someone post breakup, don’t ever think of getting back with them even if they want to.

#4. None Of You Have Changed

As mentioned above, you broke up with your ex for a reason which makes it clear that there were some differences between you two. Not just in your ex, there might be few faults in your own stars too. You might not have been understanding enough as your partner expected, and on the other hand, your partner might not have been caring enough as you expected. 

So you see, there are problems in every relationship which causes the rift between two people even with the strongest bond, but the only difference between people who split and people who stay together is - one clan tries to make things work by adopting the required changes in their behavior, whereas the others fail to do that. And, if you’re asking yourself if you should get back with your ex because you’re feeling the absence, ask yourself if you have adopted the change and if they too have done the same. In most cases, the answer is NO, and thus not getting back with your ex is the wise thing to do.  

#5. There Are Infinite Number Of Other People

If you’re willing to get back with your ex because you feel that you won’t get someone better than them, or no one else will love you like they did- wake up and open your eyes. The world is a huge place with a lot many people living along with us, so stop assuming probability just because you don’t trust yourself. I’m sure you weren’t aware that you could walk one day when you were hardly able to crawl, but you tried, and you can walk and run today. So, stop confining inside the boundaries of your own negative assumptions, you’ll never know if you can unless you try.

Whether to get back with your ex or not is a part of your own personal decision, but before you proceed and reach to any conclusion, make sure what are you asking for. If you see any chances or if you feel a second chance is worth it, then you must go on take the leap of faith. But, if the signs indicate negatively, there is a better way and that is to control your feelings and refrain from rebounding.

We hope you liked the article. Let us know if something similar happened with you and what actions you took to tackle the situation. Don’t feel shy to use the comment box, there are many people waiting to take help from your expert feedback.

(Image Courtesy: 1. Secrets of Good Girl, 2. Mark Manson, 3. Gottman, 4. Psychic Blog, 5. Girl; Bustle(Featured Image Courtesy)