"Learn to love with all your heart and accept even the unlovable side of others. For anyone can love a rose but it takes a great heart to also include the thorns." - Unknown
A long-lasting relationship romance is built upon flaws that are inevitable yet make the connection even stronger. And when you are pretty much considerate of your partner, the two of you can easily find the middle ground and loving someone despite their flaws isn't even a problem. It is necessary to accept relationship flaws for a better and successful future, as nobody is perfect and if there's unconditional love and respect, everything else appears to be insignificant. Love is accepting flaws and not ignoring it. So, this is how to accept your husband's flaws and embrace your imperfect relationship.
Imperfect Relationships: How To Accept Your Husband's Flaws?
#1. No Past Baggage
Each one of us tends to move with some amount of baggage from our past. This approach shapes out the current situation and at times also draws out an image of our future partner on the basis of past experiences. It's human nature. And because of this, there are several ways in which wives can catalog their husband's flaws - he's short, insincere, not rich, not educated enough.
One can easily become judgemental, and these perceived flaws obstruct even the right ways. But isn't it highly unacceptable to form opinions based on certain things that might/ might not have happened in your past? Perfectionism doesn't really exist, and no one can satisfy your checklist. So, no need to carry the baggage of your past when getting into the future relationship. Start afresh and embrace what you have.
(Image Courtesy: The Jonas Center)
#2. Encouragement Is An Essential Aspect
No matter how strong he is, your love and respect are all that he needs. He is trapped under the societal pressures of being a good husband and handling all family, monetary, spiritual and other such matters. So, in spite of causing, even more, distress, lookout for ways to bring about positive changes in your life.
Transformation is possible, but your eyes fall on places the husband needs to improve. He surely might be inadequate in some areas, but do not overlook his efforts that go into making you happy whenever he can. Encourage even his smallest movement and build up your relationship with utmost grace. It helps you calm your exasperating spirit and also season the speech.
#3. Are You Willing To Yield?
Sometimes, just sometimes, try to put away your personal agendas and face the decisions and the needs of your husband. He might just be right every time! Be willing not to keep plowing ahead but yield at times.
You are not just overcoming the relationship flaws but also benefiting on an individual level. Trust that something good is about to happen and be submissive in your imperfect relationship.
#4. Believe In The Power Of Expressing Gratitude
Express gratitude for the things you have. Despite all the relationship flaws, your husband might have always been the pillar of your strength. Appreciate those qualities that attracted you towards him when you two first met.
Accepting your partner's flaws becomes easy because imperfect relationships are all about affection and attention to what can be cherished and not the vulnerabilities. Start treating him much more than just a roommate and show him that you care.
#5. Are You Aware Of The Gender Differences?
Maybe, you just aren't aware of the gender differences that can arise in the relationship. He might just not be imperfect, but there must be some kind of delusions ruining the relationship. The two of you are different personalities, and both of you have a different response mechanism for every situation.
So, try focusing on things that a man would be thinking about rather than forming opinions about him and assuming him to be inadequate. You never know there just is a difference of perspective and you are just like any other couple.
(Image Courtesy: Huffington Post)
#6. There's No Prince Charming
Get rid of the idea that a Prince Charming actually exists. You are deceiving not just yourself but even the relationship, thinking that he could be your perfect Prince Charming and not a regular guy. Don't let your unrealistic expectations sustain anymore.
Rather, make your husband a reason for your happiness, security as well as strength. Just devote your time towards accepting his flaws, and he will leave no stone unturned for you. In fact, you might not even consider his flaws while being with him.
#7. Just Move Ahead Of The Imperfect Relationship
Always cribbing about your imperfect relationship does nothing other than just getting in immeasurable agony. Change the dynamics of your relationship, move ahead of the relationship flaws. Love is about accepting flaws, love someone despite their flaws and change the rules of your relationship.
Start working on your personal imperfections. Stop lecturing your man about how his inadequacies bother you. Ask God for forgiveness to all the cruelties you have caused to the relationship and seek the power along with wisdom to show some kindness towards your partner and accept him the way he is.
(Image Courtesy: Good Housekeeping)
Things To Keep In Mind While Accepting Your Partner's Flaws
#1. All his quirks are very real if they don't affect your emotional or physical self (abuse is what we are talking about). So, be confident while discussing him in public and don't feel ashamed.
#2. Until and unless it isn't a serious defect, you are married to a great guy, be happy and cherish the moments you create with him.
#3. In the case of abuse, cheating or severe neglect, just leave him! He is not worth your time and efforts. But if you feel the usual boredom or frustration is an indication of a flawed husband, you are wrong, my friend.
#4. The best way to love someone despite their flaws is to admit yours too!
(Image Courtesy: Huffington Post)
#5. Try seeing the good stuff that has always been there but you constantly overlooked the same. Minor disturbances hid major celebrations.
At the end, we would like to advise you to stop behaving like a controlling wife. Being manipulative wouldn't get your tasks done when it comes to relationship problems. Give up on focusing his weakness. Let go the attitude where you expect him to say or act according to your desires. When you enforce the power of control in relationships, they are bound to fall apart.
If you use the technique of external control, you are paving way for unhappiness. If you ask him to behave in a way you want, not to meet people you dislike, start dressing like someone else because you don't like what he wears, then you have been using the methods of external control to decide for him the rights and wrongs.
You feel he is inadequate, and hence you are creating a clone of yourself! Love and accept your partner's flaws, no cloning, please!
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