Does he Love Me or Not?

1,828 Views Updated: 09 Dec 2017
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So me and my boyfriend are not on the same country but we do plan to meet tho just not now cause were still young and can't travel alone. He talks about me being his wife in the future. He cried once when I said goodbye and asks me to stay cause I got so mad at him cause I cried and ask for forgiveness but he can stand it that I'm crying he only forgave when i said goodbye. He's okay giving me all his social media accounts, he cares about me, my health and all. He's protective of me he doesn't want me to wear shorts and skirts, he doesn't want me to post my bikini pictures on the internet, he doesn't want me to have male friends. He doesn't watch porn he said its because he only wants to see my body nobody else body but just mine. Since we have a long distance relationship, we always video call, back then I can't always cause were not legal, if I said no I can't video call, he will get sad but now that were legal we can now video call even my fam is around. But this time, i feel like it's not his own will to do video call it's like were only doing it cause I want to see him and because I ask him to do so. He wants to see my breast and he said it's normal for guys to wanting to see their gf's body and now he is asking me to show him my body and he said if I showed him, he swear he wont ask again to show him mine. I said no, he didn't get mad but I noticed everytime now that we will do vid call, he always ask me to stand up and I do cause it's not a big deal but one night we fight it cause he wants me again to stand up and it sounds demanding just from the tone of his voice and I didnt like it I dont know why he wants me to constantly do it but my friend said it's because he wants to see my body and that I'm innocent. Well for my boyfriend he said he just ask it for fun no big deal and from my perspective I got mad cause it's like he sees me as his possesion not his princess but he said im his princess, and said that my thoughts are just always negative. He said "next time don't ask me to do video call if you can't even stand up for me" it's like I'm asking for it and not his own will to see me??? Am I right? And he said "I got so nervous(mad) I always try to come back home soon and try to do homeworks at school to talk to you more instead of doing homeworks at home" "but you can't even stand up for me" finally he said this "I will call only when I have free time" "I think it's useless to do homeworks at school" "home is better" I said okay then I will do the same and said do whatever you want. Does he really love me ? Or I'm just being so needy and always want to feel loved?

Answers (6)

I agree with other readers as I too do not believe that he loves you. When you love someone, you do not try to control their behavior or force them to do something that they do not want to do, which pretty evidently exists in your relationship. I understand that you feel that you are in love with him but you have to realize the fact that you can’t truly know a person just by chatting with them on the internet or video calling them. It’s not love that you two share and I am sure that you will realize this after some time. I will also say that you are too young to be involved in things of such sorts. You have your entire life in front of you so take a step back, focus on your studies and forget about this person.

This person is not in love with you. If the guy calls you with cute names then it does not mean that he is in love with you. A person’s behavior will tell you if they love you or not. You are a school student and it would be better that you focus on your education more than this person who doesn’t seem to care about you or your likes. He just wants to use your emotions against you in his favor. Such kind of people will never show their real side. If he really loved you then he would have respected your privacy. How are you in love with a person from another country? How did you meet him? Do you know what he does there?
Love is not something that you can take so lightly. It will take time to understand what true love is and you cannot expect true love to occur at this age. Make your parents proud and do not stress yourself for someone who does not deserve you. You will find many more people coming in your life and then leaving but do not feel about it. Be a strong person and stop talking to this guy you think loves you.

A lot of people face this kind of behavior from their partner when he or she tries to control the other person in an indirect manner. Demanding things, once in a while is perfectly okay but going to the extent of fighting with your partner just because he or she did not adhere to one of the demands is completely unhealthy and should be unacceptable in a relationship. Considering your situation, I feel that both of you need to communicate to each other and convey whatever you feel to find if both of you are on the same page or not. Sometimes, we keep on going in a relationship without realizing that one or both the partners are not satisfied and happy. Such a situation can never bring happiness to life. Yours is a long-distance relationship and things are a little harder for you to handle because of the distance that binds both of you. However, there is always a solution to every problem. Tell your boyfriend very clearly that you are not okay with showing your body on a video call. Tell him that when he demands this particular thing, you feel like an asset and not a human being with feelings and desires. If he really loves you, he will understand your perspective and will never get angry about something as silly as this. Love is not time's fool and nobody can separate both of you if you truly love each other. Do not be scared to voice your opinions and say 'no' to something you are not comfortable doing. Instead, be bold and tell the other person that you are a strong person and would appreciate things to go the right way. If he still doesn't understand you, he is not the right guy for you. You are young. Do not waste your time on someone who gives you mixed signals and doesn't understand you. There is nothing like being in love partially. Also, when you love someone you make an effort to understand his or her feelings.

I believe that both of you like talking to each other but that's all this is, it is mutual admiration coupled with the feeling of wanting more of each other and more often than not it is due to the fact that you both are new to each other and have not explored all aspects both physical and emotional. For you to fall in love there must be a good understanding between you and him which comes from a lot more talking as right now your relationship is just in its nascent stage. It is perfectly normal for him to want to see your body and touch it as he is sexually attracted to you and while you may have the same feeling you are cautious because you don’t want to make a mistake and give him a chance and regret it later. To be honest you have two choices, either you can take a risk and see his body and show your body on video call and when you do this he will want to see you and touch you and the other choice is to tell him to wait till you are ready. If he waits for you to be ready then he understands you want time and trust comes slow if he cannot wait then he is just impulsive and wants to have his first sexual experience and you seem to him as the perfect person since you are new to relationships yourself.

What you need to understand is the fact that if he did really love you he will not demand anything from you and his interaction with you will not be based on whether you fulfill his demands or not. If he really loves you he will not demand things from you or make it necessary to follow any of his instructions. it is important for you to understand that how someone will treat you is not dependent on what they wish to treat you like but it is dependent on how you allow them to treat you. If his behavior ever makes you feel uncomfortable then you will need to understand that fact that there is something that is not serving you in the relationship. if there is real appreciation and love you will never have o doubt about him being in love with you or not.

I believe if he loves you, he wouldn’t demand anything from you. Moreover, you can’t judge or know a person as you are not meeting him. Meeting the person you are in love with says a lot about their personality. I would honestly suggest you take a back step at this moment and wait if he comes back and makes effort to be with you. Don’t invest yourself emotionally and mentally till the time you are not sure about him. It will hurt you at the end. Try to know him better first and then take a decision. Take Care!

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