Parents are perhaps the most important part in any person’s life. It is impossible for someone to think of the life where he/she wouldn’t have his/her parents. Everyone loves their parents, and while there may be ideological differences between kids and their parents, nothing can equate to the love and warmth that parents can provide.
But as we know, life’s not always a merry story. Men, after all, are only mortal. People lose their parents at some stage in life. But perhaps, it is toughest to lose them as a young kid. It is almost certain that if you lose a parent a very young age, you’ll have to go through things that no one will ever understand.
We understand that losing a parent and that too at a young age is disheartening. But, life goes on, and you really have to wear this as an armor. It can be difficult to cope with a parent’s loss at a young age, but you have to get over it. Here’s how.
Anyone who has lost a parent at a young age can tell you that it will give you never-ending pain. You’ll find yourself in dark times and question the existence of God, every moment will become a second nature to you. It becomes tough because you don’t know where to go in search of solace. The truth is, people who haven’t lost their parents will never understand what you’re going through. And most times, when they try to console, they fail miserably in doing so.
Besides, the effects of losing a parent can be quite drastic. For once, you’ll begin to miss everything that you used to hate about your parent. From that constant interference in your life to those billion text messages and everything in between, you’ll miss all habits of your parent. Holidays like Christmas and New Year’s will lose most of their charm. But the show must go on, and you’ll eventually have to come to terms with reality.
No one wants to live a life without their parents, but if hell breaks upon someone, they will have to cope with that. Here are a few ways in which you can cope with the loss of a parent at a young age. Take a look:
#1. Admit
To begin with, it is important for you to accept that you no longer have your parent. Now, that can be an impossible task for the most mature of adults, but it is the way it is. That’s how nature works. People come, people go. The sooner you admit and accept that you no longer have a parent by your side, the quicker will you be able to put it behind you and have a happy life.
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Yes, everything above might sound as if spoken without emotion, but it is always important to look at the practical side of things as well. Take your time, but come to terms with reality. If you fail to accept and face things quickly, you’ll be sucked into an emotional abyss and coming out of it would be impossible. Do yourself a favor and face things as they are.
#2. Memories
Growing up, you must have had a lot of memories with your parents. Be it the first family trip you people took or the countless times you relaxed at the beach with them. Make an album or anything where you can live those memories every day. Try to hang pictures of your parent all around your place and just stare at them whenever you have the time.
It would be great if you leave their room untouched; so that whenever you go there, you’ll find everything exactly where they used to keep it. This way, a part of them will always remain in the house. Not that it can ever replace their physical presence, but it would help you big time in overcoming their sad demise.
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#3. Forgiving
Parents do irritate us a lot. Also, they do a lot of things that often hurt us. If your parents ever did something that hurt you terribly, just forgive them once they are gone. In fact, forgive them for the biggest crime they did to you: leaving you all by yourself. Our parents, just like us are imperfect beings. Just like us, they commit a lot of mistakes. But, once they’re gone, you should not remember for the bad they did to you, but for the happy times, you lived with them.
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The point is, dealing with the loss of a parent is a big task in itself. If you hold grudges against them, it only makes matters worse. So, just let the pain go and forgive them for everything.
#4. Talk To Others
We understand that when people try to console you, it is rarely of any help. And, that is not what we would urge you to do. Listen to what people have to say and don’t judge them. They’re trying their best to help you out. Instead, talk about your parents freely. People should be talked about even when they’re gone. Your parents left a legacy behind, and you got to talk about it.
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Talking about them would soon make things easy for you. You no longer would have to avoid people, and you can really go out and start socializing again. When you start doing that, you’ll eventually feel a heavy weight lifting off of your chest.
#5. Cry
Yes, cry till you can. Cry as much as you want to and just let the pain out. It is absolutely normal to cry when you’ve lost a parent. You don’t have to pretend to be strong. Cry whenever you want to., wherever you want to. Crying makes things a lot easier. That is the very reason why humans have been blessed with the power of crying. You cry, and then things seem a bit better to you.
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Apart from that, it doesn’t matter how long your parent has been gone. It might just be yesterday, or it might have been 20 years. Any random thing can ignite certain memories and make you cry, which is absolutely fine.
#6. Live Your Life
There is no reason that you should stop going out or alter your daily routine after losing your parent. One of the biggest mistakes that people make is that they chose a life of isolation when they lose a parent. That can have several negative repercussions. It can make you feel that the loss of a parent has changed you as a person, while in reality, it is just you refusing to accept the reality.
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Continue living your life. Surely it would be tough initially, but trust us that it can help in making you feel better a lot quicker. The fact is, you have a life too. You have responsibilities, and after you lose a parent, those responsibilities increase multifold. So, don’t give up on your life and just go about it. There will be moments of pain, of grief when you would want to leave everything, but that that is not the right thing to do.
So, there you have it. The effects of losing a parent at a young age are certainly painful. But, you have to find ways to cope with the unfortunate reality. If you think this article helped you or can help a friend of yours, let us know in the comments below.
(Featured Image Courtesy: Scary Mommy)
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