Looks Vs Personality: What truly Matters to you in a Marriage?

1,104 Views Updated: 20 Nov 2017
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Looks Vs Personality: What truly Matters to you in a Marriage?

Most of us would not accept the fact that external appearances do matter to us! The extent of it can vary from person to person, but the feelings and expectation remain the same. This is a behavioral science that dictates our psychology of giving significance to the right looks & perfect attire.

It is somewhat a fact that attractive people do find it easier to pave their ways, be it dating, socializing or anything else. Getting to know about their intelligence and deciding to take things further or not is a later judgment. But this also brings us to the point which people get mixed up with - It isn't just the looks but the overall personality & charm of the other person that pulls us towards them. 

According to a study at the Harvard Universtiy, it has been proven that an average interviewer makes the candidate's impression in the initial 30 seconds. The looks are then tried to be justified throughout the interview. These are real-life instances, but does the same logic applies when it comes to choosing your life partner?

Do you look for beauty with brains, just brains or just beauty? Let's have a look at what attracts men and women into lasting relationships.

Research About Men & Women In Long Term Or Short-Term Relationships

According to a study published in the Proceedings of the Royal Society, Biological Sciences, psychologists concluded that how the partner acts is more relevant in the long run than just the looks he/ she has. 

They mentioned in the study how women seek masculine men when opting for short-term relations. Whereas for the long-term relationships, women preferred men with the features of kindness and trustworthiness. 

On the other side, even men were taken into consideration determining that they prefer young women for short-term relations. But the one who is mature and intelligent with being fertile (to have children) were more favored for long-term relationships. 

Personality v/s Looks

Synonyms for the word personality present several good characteristics of a person. Ranging from nature, temperament, persona, identity, worth to psyche and other such qualities, personality sums up the entire individuality of a person. Whereas, good looks regard only the outward appearance. Marriages are much superior to consider just the looks of a person. 

Short term causal relationships are on a different level, but marriages are more than a decision of yes or no. If you have learned to see past the surface, you will know what we are talking about.

#1. A Connection Deeper Than External

You would never run out of conversations when you maintain a connection that’s deeper than what you see on the outer side. It’s something on the mental level that makes you challenge the significant other, lift their spirit, laugh with them and support them! There’s an intimacy for your inner selves that talks loud and connects the two of you! This definitely cannot be achieved with just good external appearances!

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#2. Desirability Just Grows

When you connect with the other person spiritually and not just across the table, relationships grow bolder and much stronger. The desirability to stay together and spend time together doesn’t fade and seems to get even better.

#3. You Exude Contentment

When your personalities click, you won’t any longer be the couple sitting at the restaurant yet looking at their phones in search of something else. You’ll become the one looking at each other, radiating happiness and crossing over bridges together! You are wrapped in your world of togetherness where, if at all anything goes wrong; you’ll be there supportively standing beside and inspiring rather than being gullible and leaving the stand.

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#4. You Share Visions, You Share Brains!

There is no struggle in indulging with each other. There’s no decoding happening, just pure understanding. You start to precisely read minds, and sometimes it’s like hearing voices of their heads. And you anyway know the responses of your partner. You share brains, and when it’s personality, you even share visions.

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#5. Bed Isn’t The World

When we talk about a lively personality that you opt for sustaining long-term relationships, arousal doesn’t just happen on the bed! No hot body can value a relationship like that of a spiritually awakened mind. The desires begin even before touching each other. The exciting conversations, your goals, dreams, and fears ignite a spark that’s greater than the spark of just the bedtime.  

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But everyone has their viewpoints on this topic. Some regard looks like the market value that attracts more transactions. Men & women do screen each other’s looks, consciously or subconsciously, and it somehow keeps happening at the back of their minds. Many believe that looks can be important for initial interactions. However, it can also be deceiving. 

To build on long-term engagements, aspects like similarity, emotional connections, mental distance, and openness matters and rest all is superficial. Let us know what you think about the same through the comment section below. We would love to hear from you!

(Image Courtesy: 1, WordPress, 2. Professor House, 3. Pinterest, 4. Pinterest; Reader's Digest (Featured Image Courtesy)
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