Would you choose you or yourself? (Long distance relationship choice)

I'm going to start with my questions that my heart and my brain can't fine together. As you read in the question, I am now on a long distance relationship for almost 2 years, and we are in love. We are both from italy, but I'm from South and he's from North. As time passes, I decided to move in Germany for personal problems. It's more like a journey to discover myself and to understand better my persona and for start to be more independent. I'll start to say that me and my family don't have a really close relationship, in fact this "running away" from home is something really important to me. In contrary, my boyfriend is really close to his family and in that he and I live in different ideal world: I am spontaneous, adventurous, am highachiever and a dreamer; meanwhile he likes the ordinary, to analyse and the daily routine, which I can't stand. I sometimes think about breaking up with him because I don't want him to suffer too much cause of my decisions, and I don't want him to waste too much time on me... but I can't cause I'm too much in love with him, and he can't too cause he's too attached to me. I know we should just fight at this point, but I feel like we'll just get hurt until we'll be effectively together...

I'm planning on going to study in Germany for 3 years, but I still don't know what future has planned for me, and he's trying to figure out what to do aswell for us.

what would you do?