Everyone has some quirks and traits which are different and some people may not like them. When you look for a potential relationship with a person, you do put an effort to figure out certain traits in that person that are a big 'no no' for you. These are the traits that you are completely unwilling to tolerate in your partner. Such traits are called 'relationship deal breakers'. If you have a list of things that you can’t tolerate in a guy or a girl, you should be very clear about the deal breakers in the relationship. While there are people who can tolerate the occasional breaking of the deal, some people cannot do away with it at all. However, some people do stay and give a chance even after a betrayal.
Though, every relationship needs some compromises. It is impossible to get 100% of what you wanted as nobody is really perfect. There are always things like 'must haves' in your partner, then there is 'it would be nice if they have', and then there is 'absolutely shouldn’t have this' as well. If your partner has that 'absolutely shouldn’t have this' qualities, then you might just need to reconsider the relationship. Before jumping to the conclusion, let us have a look at what's a relationship deal breaker is?
There are several tendencies and behaviors that a person finds intolerable to deal with. Such behaviors, characteristics, and traits are called deal breakers. However, when we talk about what actually a relationship deal breaker is, then the definition might differ a bit from person to person. To a great extent, it always depends on a person what actually he or she can deal with and tolerate. For some people,even silly and absolutely arbitrary behaviors could be 'deal breakers' while for others, even betrayal is not a 'deal breaker'. Therefore, the definition varies depending on the degree of tolerance in a particular person. Mostly, everyone has a list of deal breakers that they like to adhere to when in a relationship with someone. Deal breakers set the limits in a relationship but in certain situations, they also tend to ruin the relationships due to one of the partner's intolerant attitude towards even silly mistakes.
#1. First Of All, Figure Out What You Want In Your Life
The utmost important thing is to figure out what you want. Once you know what you want, you will be clear about the things which you can or can't tolerate. Consider all the facts, delve into your past relationships and then decide what are the deal breakers for you. Understand your relationship in order to know what it is lacking and what can be improvised, or can be even improvised or not? You can discuss it with your friends so that they can help you to get a clear idea of what you actually want as friends always know us better.
#2. Talk To Your Partner
It seems simple, but it is the most difficult thing to do though. You need to become an effective communicator in order to know what is in their mind. If you will use your communication skills with them efficiently, you can talk about the deal breakers in your relationship in a better way. You both want to be loved and respected by each other. Listen carefully to each other so that you can focus on the solution.
#3. Find The Right And Neutral Place To Talk It Out
You, of course, don’t want to talk out the complex things at a place where there are hundreds of people around you. There is no point of assuming things in your head and not talk all of the problems with your partner. In order to have a better relationship, you should always confront them but only at right place. Therefore, find a peaceful and neutral place to talk to your partner where you can clearly listen to each other. A club or crowded place won’t work for such a discussion.
#4. Give Yourself Enough Time To Evaluate Their Answers
Jumping to the conclusion will be the worse thing you can do at this point. Take enough time to evaluate what they actually wanted to say. Once you are done with having a conversation with them, give yourself a little time to process the information. The moment you had a discussion with them, your evaluation will start but don’t burst out until and unless you are very sure about you and them.
#5. Do Something Once You Are Done Evaluating
Once the evaluation process is done, figure out how can it be solved and you can get rid of those deal-breaking habits of your partner. You might decide to work upon the relationship or you might decide to end the relationship right away. However, if the relationship can be fixed, it should be given a chance. Try to embrace your relationship if it is long and filled with memories and emotions. Give up or give it a new start, but do something. Don’t let it happen to you again especially when you have had a conversation regarding it.
#6. Know the Right Time To Give Up
It is hard of course, but there is no point of being with someone if you are not happy with them. However, realize the fact that you can’t conquer all the battles. If the person you have been with is not ready to give up some of their habits for you, then there is nothing left in that relationship. You alone can’t handle everything. Therefore, know the right time to walk back and leave them on the state they are. If you can’t take it anymore, it is useless to get the hold of that unproductive relationship when you are not even happy being in it.
This was our guide to overcome deal breakers in a relationship. Let us know if you like the article and share your suggestions with us in the comments section below. We look forward to your replies.
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