Is it ok to date Multiple People at the same Time?

2,126 Views Updated: 12 Sep 2017
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Is it ok to date Multiple People at the same Time?

We all know the fact that we have certain kind of preferences when it comes to the kind of person we wish to spend our lives with. This is not just part of the illusions we have and the dreams we have regarding the kind of life we wish to have in future. This concept of finding someone who will be able to suit your personality, which you will feel comfortable with, someone who has the same kind of dreams as you do, is truly essential to the kind of life we all will go on to live in our future. The fact that the person who you choose to live your lives with will actually go on to effect the kind of decisions you choose to make in terms of your career and all the other aspects of life, is something we all need to keep in mind.

The question remains that if we aim to find such an individual for ourselves, we will have to go ahead and get to know a bunch of people. We will have to invest our time in getting to know various individuals. If you turn out to be super lucky, you might find such a person at the right time without having to look for them. But, that is just a very rosy picture to paint. We do understand the fact that we all will have to make an effort to know people who seem to be interested in and at the same time we will also have to make an effort to get to know the people we seem to like. At the same time it is essential to keep in mind the fact that many things are not really in our hand, we may or may not find the right kind of person at the point of time we wish to. It may not happen immediately, but we know the fact that at the right time we all find someone who will walk the path along with us and are the perfect match to our personality.

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When we talk about getting to know people the most well-known concept that comes up is ‘dating.' The concept of dating is not very old; it is comparatively a very new trend. If we take a look at the way things were earlier and the way they have panned out, we can easily identify the fact that people fell in love and married their lovers. This is something that has been happening for quite a long period of time. But, over the years there has been a change in the way people have been viewing romantic relationships. Now, it is no more about just falling in love and getting married. People are seeking companions who will not only walk the path of life with them but, will also share similar beliefs and will support their dreams. As people have become more progressive and have become open minded over the years, they now wish to have a lot more understanding and compassion in a relationship. Over the years the role of women have also drastically changed, now women express their opinion more openly and are more independently in comparison to what they were earlier. These kinds of changes also have significantly affected the approach of people in romantic relationships.

These changes have led to the entire concept of dating. After you meet an individual who you feel can be your best companion, you spend a considerable amount of time together to get to know each other. This time that people began to take to spend together to get to know each other was termed as dating. Over the years the concept of dating has gone through various changes. In the recent times, people do not refrain from dating multiple people and make an effort to get to know these individuals. Initially, whether these relationships will last or not is not generally the concern. This is what one aspect of dating is. On the other hand, you can be someone who is dating only one individual because you feel this person has a strong potential to be your life partner. You can belong to any of the sides, irrespective of dating men or dating women. One aspect that remains constant is the fact that your personal opinion on what you wish to gain from the relationship and what a romantic relationship means to you is completely dependent on you and can be very different from the rest of the world.

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This idea that the meaning of a relationship is different from person to person, often raises the question, is it alright to date multiple people at the same time? The answer to which clearly is, this kind of judgment cannot be made on the entire society as a whole. The reasons for this are:

#1. The entire world does not think alike; each person has a very different idea of what a romantic relationship means to them, it is a very subjective topic to deal with. When it comes to what people will expect from their romantic relationships you cannot generalize it. At the end of the day what one chooses to do in their personal relationship will be restricted to them and their partner’s preferences.

#2. We are free to have our own opinion; we are free to have our own expectations from our romantic relationships. But, we certainly cannot impose those beliefs on others. What we need to keep in mind is the fact that we all develop our concepts of what our lives and relationships will be, from the kind of experiences we all have in our lives. Since all our journeys are very different, we cannot judge any one's decisions and choices on the basis of our concept of love and relationships. We do not know what they have encountered in their lives, so we cannot see where they are coming from and why they have a certain kind of outlook of the world. Thus, irrespective of whether we feel dating multiple people to be a right idea or not, we cannot take that decision on behalf of the rest of the world.

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#3. There is a set pattern which many generations have been following a long period of time, which includes, getting a job, getting married and starting a family as an integral part of adult life. As time has changed, it has also changed these patterns of living. Nowadays, people have started paving their own path. People do not blindly follow the set patterns of the society anymore. Many people choose to pursue their passion and not take up a job. Many have chosen not to start a family and devote their lives to a particular purpose they have chosen. This is also the reason why the idea of what people are looking to have as a part of their romantic relationship has changed over time. Thus, many feel dating multiple people at the same time will give them a better opportunity to find and discover what they are looking for. On the other hand, people who are looking at having a traditional relationship, who wish to have a committed relationship and create a strong bonding with one individual, will not find it comfortable to date multiple people at the same time.

What I have learned from my journey is the fact that a romantic relationship is not something that is meant to complete you. You need to have a strong self-esteem and a strong amount of self-love for yourself. As against the common notion that your partner completes you, you need to see things differently. It truly is about two complete people coming together to create a relationship that is not based on the notion of them depending on each other but coming together to create a life of their dreams and support as well as encourage each other in the process. Keeping this in mind, whether you choose to date multiple people or you wish to wait for the person who will share the same kind of life goals as you, we cannot reach a conclusion regarding what you are seeking from your relationship.

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We also need to keep in mind that with the advent of the internet, the access to choices of various kinds is just a click away. You can even choose to date people online these days. We do not need to wait for hours to get in touch with people; this often makes it difficult for us to choose and also reach a proper decision. At the same time people who have clear idea regarding the fact that they would like to stick to one individual and create a meaning full relationship also manage to do so.

What are you looking for in your relationship with your partner? What do you feel about the concept of dating multiple people at the same time? Please comment in the box below and let us know your opinion.

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Posted by: Aiden Posts: (4) Opinions: (9) Points: 540 Rank: 261
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Answer

I do not really have a huge experience with relationships, but what I feel I have learned from my experience, is the fact that, why any particular individual will choose to do anything or the way they will choose to behave in a relationship is something we cannot term as for right or wrong. Things are not that black and white in life. Although, I will agree with the fact that I am pretty old-fashioned when it comes to my opinion about dating and romantic relationships. I also truly believe that it is essential to give others space and each has the right to go about dealing with life the way they choose to. Yes, it is live and let live I am talking about. 

I truly have never been a supporter of the concept of dating more than one person. You can be friends and get to know a person and then decide whether you wish to take the relationship to the next level or not. The other fact I believe is that if you strike a chord with a person and they have the intention to make the relationship work, the two of you will make sure you made it work. Dating one person who you feel has a strong potential to be your life partner does make sense. But, to what does not become clear when you choose to date multiple people, where is your integrity? Do you really love any of them? Is all of this just for fun? There needs to be a strong distinction between having a good time and developing a true deep bond.

At the end of the day it is all about what you believe in, if you truly trust in the fact that you will be able to develop a strong relationship with a person who will prove to be a great companion for you, you will surely manage to do that. On the other hand, if you do not believe in this idea you will end up creating just that.

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