Couples who have age difference in their relationship have added struggles that other couples do not have to deal with. They are usually stereotyped, judged and questioned about their relationship. And just like the other areas of life, here too the women in the relationship falls prey to substantial judgments.
Relationships with age differences bring out the hypocrisy of our society so apparently that while the man is applauded for scoring a younger girl or an older woman, the woman at the same time is looked down for preying on an old and rich husband or a young boy. All she gets to hear is 'she is such a gold digger, or is she too desperate to marry a boy and not a man'?
In addition to the extra judgment, the couples with a significant age difference in their relationship have multiple adversities to overcome and surely need some guidance on how to deal with them. Here we have compiled some suggestions to help the couples who struggle because of the age difference in a relationship that they share with their partners.
#1. Be Ready To Get Judged
Every couple has their own reasons which make them susceptible to judgments. We live in a mean world where people feed on the loss of others. They are always up for judging you and your partner maybe because you have an interracial marriage, or are involved with the same sex or have an age difference in your relationship. Fortunately, with time passing by, the society has become a little accepting towards unorthodox relationships, but there’s still a lot more to accommodate.
Also, with more and more powerful women breaking through societal barriers and threatening the patriarchy, are choosing to be in, what some may see as, abnormal relationships, forcing the society to push their limits and be accepting.
Click Here: Is it wrong to Date a Guy Younger to You?
#2. Confused About The Future?
When you have an age difference in your relationship, the future may seem oblique. You might like everything in the present, but when you have a partner with an age difference, one needs to think about adversities that come with it, say whether they want or can have children, future health issues, change in sex, financial security following the demise of one partner. They may sound mean in the present day but will have to be faced in the future to come. If you marry someone with a large age gap, biological changes are sure to take place, so be prepared to jump roadblocks about raising children or the possibility of not having kids, far before facing disappointments. Stop overthinking and give your best to the relationship.
#3. Fighting The Natural Process Of Ageing
When you are the older partner in the relationship, insecurities are bound to happen. While your love countered all the odds of the society, you cannot fight the natural process of aging. As the older partner, you’ll always be skeptical of your younger half leaving you for someone their age. This is a valid concern and relationship experts suggest that topics like these should be brought up gradually and sensitively in the relationship. However, one should always keep in mind the fact that there is no such 'perfect' age to be in a relationship or for that matter even to get married or have sex.
Also Read: How to Age Gracefully?
#4. How To Meet His Or Her Parents?
He’s just a few years younger to my dad, how do I take him home? What would daddy think? Will mommy judge me? How do I introduce him as my boyfriend? What would they think?
Awkward right? We can feel you. It can be hell awkward for you to introduce your partner to the family when you two share a huge age gap, like yes Dad, he was probably your immediate junior in college and it’ll be fun because you two will be able to gel in easily... Err.. Super clumsy!!
Parents being parents will obviously fill you up with unsolicited pieces of advice and make unfounded predictions about the inevitable failure of your relationship because of the age difference. When you really plan on introducing your partner to your family, all you can do is not to get defensive. Your family wants you to be happy and their doubts and confusions are natural and obvious. It may take time for them to understand and accept your relationship but they’ll surely come around.
One of the best ways to avoid unnecessary family drama because of the age difference in your relationship is by preventing any confusion and coming straight out about your relationship. Like, do not give anyone the opportunity for making innocent guesses (Is he your uncle? or is he your dad’s friend?). The moment you introduce them to your family, make sure you confirm the relationship then and there. Any hesitations in being honest could end up in making the situation more awkward and confusing.
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#4. This Is Not Just A Phase
Couples with age difference in a relationship may also have to deal with not being taken seriously. In cases like these, family and friends often feels that it is just a phase and you’ll get over it in some time, nothing SERIOUS. If this happens, then there’s really no point in convincing people to take your relationship seriously. You need to understand that your family and friends will take time to accept your unorthodox age difference in the relationship. Try helping them to cope with the situation rather than fighting them about the same.
#5. What Do You Exactly Talk About?
When you are in an age difference relationship, some generational differences are bound to surface. If you are with an older partner, you can obviously not expect them to know who John Snow is (Game Of Thrones) and they too won’t be able to enjoy listening to jazz with someone who’s all hip-hoppy. Frustration regarding the choices of food, songs or movies is inevitable. Also, it’ll be difficult for you both to share a common group of friends because of the age difference.
When in a relationship with someone with an age difference, you will both have to find common grounds to stay together and enjoy each other’s company. And if two people are meant to be together, they will come out with some ideas that can keep them together and well connected.
Click Here to read about Effects of Age Gap in Relationships
#5. Is He/ She A 'Know It All' Partner?
As per the relationship experts, the older partner in the relationship will surely be the one with more experience and knowledge and will certainly feel superior because of his or her age. Communication, as in any other relationship, should be very smooth and transparent. It is natural for your older partner to know more about certain fields of knowledge, try to learn from them. But if they are being too proud of it, there’s surely something more to just boasting their knowledge. Make sure to evaluate the possible reason that can make your relationship unhealthy. Get rid of them.
When you are in a relationship with age difference you will have to face the struggles that come with it. The best answer to most of these problems is patience, loving your partner unconditionally and collectively coming out with creative solutions. Communication is yet another way to deal with the age difference in your relationship.
If you are nervous about how your family and friends will react to your relationship, communicate the same to your partner about what you expect from the meeting. If you and your older or younger partner cannot agree on the same music to listen to while riding, then buy an audiobook instead. Relationships are all about compromises, and a relationship with an age gap is no different. Compromise, communicate and be creative to make your age gap relationship work.
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Do you and your partner are in a relationship with the huge age difference? How do you deal with the struggle of being with an older or younger partner? How do you handle the age difference in your relationship? We would love to know your experiences and thoughts, so please share them with us in the comment box below.