How to Stop Fighting in a Relationship?

2,242 Views Updated: 20 Jul 2018
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How to Stop Fighting in a Relationship?

Relationships are messy, and they determine the emotional state of an individual who is invested in it. The difference of opinion in relationships is not uncommon. What you believe in and what your partner believes in may vary as the environment the two of you grew up in was different.

A lot of couples even contest polarizing views on the same topic, and these arguments often shake each other to the depths of their core. Some fights are nasty, some are silly, and some are outright outrageous, but they all happen. We bring you ways in which you can stop a fight in its tracks whenever it runs the risk of snowballing into a disaster.

Ways In Which You Can Stop Fights In A Relationship

# 1. Figure Out Where You Have The Difference


A lot of couples go on yelling and shouting at each other without really addressing the thing they are shouting about. They just keep their mouth pointed at their partner like it’s a cannon hurling words at them which are insulting and demeaning. We tend to lose all our anger when we realize what it is we are really fighting about. Most of the time the issue is a mere trifle, and it can never matter more than a person who is full of warmth and love for us. It’s really important that you figure out what has caused you to become this indignant and tell it to your partner as most of the time they will just mock the seriousness of the situation when they really think about the importance of the thing you are annoyed about.

# 2.  Don’t Let The Issues Pile Up

One of the main reasons for a fight breaking out is that your partner has not addressed the feeling that is bothering you. It is a difficult thing to do regularly as you always cannot get the time to talk about what you are going through. Lack of communication occurs from not getting the time to speak to your partner as both of you are not as available as you were, at the beginning of the relationship. Once you begin stuffing your feelings, time will come where you find yourself shouting in an incoherent manner and your partner despising that state. The key is to talk every day and really tell your partner any significant development in the day.

# 3.  Whenever Your Voice Raises Try To Talk Funny


Humor never disappoints, and it never lets you stay angry as well. One of the best ways to disarm your anger is to take away the seriousness of the situation from it, The best way to make something that is really bugging you light-hearted is to change your own attitude towards it. This is all there is to it. Some of the venting at your partner is because he or she is not able to bring a change in your attitude.If you do it even once, chances are your partner will remember it and use it to kill your anger by talking in a funny voice that helps you loosen up.

# 4. Be Transparent About Money

Not being transparent about money can go a long way in damaging the relationship as at the end of the day security and honesty matter a lot in any relationship. If you are going through a financial situation, it is best to admit to your partner the truth because if you avoid it chances are you will shout at your loved one. Thinking about more than one thing at a time can cause stress to anyone, and you are sure to vent if you avoid talking about the thing which is on your mind. Other than this if you don’t take the support of your loved one during turbulent times, then you will be repeating the same behavior which was on display when you were single - talking to yourself and doing all yourself.

# 5. Click The Happiness


As human beings, we are designed to be happy at all times, and this can be looked on as a boon or a bane. Happiness never lays its finger on its pulse which means that when we are happy we don’t really care for anything else. It’s is recommended to indulge in the selfie-craze when you are happy as every one of us tends to forget things rapidly in this era where we feel we are not doing as much as we should. If and when a fight breaks out all you need to do is pull out your phone and see the images that stop you from believing all has gone to shit.

# 6.  Know The Long Run

A minor setback or a small shortcoming can never be too strong to threaten a relationship. There are deal-breakers of course, but the relationship would not hold firm for a couple of months if the interest in each other had not blossomed. Whenever you get too attached to something and value it a lot, you must know that your partner is more important because you will fall out of love with the thing eventually. The tendency to defend your love for a particular thing you like when your partner taunts you about it can lead to fights. The sensible thing to do in such times is to politely tell them “ok let’s do something else” and know that in the long run even your partner may get attached to it or give you space to like it when they are occupied with something themselves.

# 7. Know The Science of Moments


There is only one science of moments; it is that they come and go. Moments are what one’s life is made up of. Every since birth till death, a man has his moments which define him. Like moments, fights also define a relationship. Any fight that goes on for too long helps grow feelings of resentment and regret, and no one wants to live in despair, so they have two choices to either stop the fight or terminate the relationship. It’s a difficult truth to stomach as life cannot be lived without hope and most people who try to live without hope either are too depressed or develop some kind of anxiety disorder. The right conduct is to forgive everything that irritates you and increase your inner calm. It will give you the sense that in the great scheme of things everything is redundant, so it’s up to you to value relationships.

# 8.  Accept The Errors

Life is full of mistakes whether deliberate or unintentional and accepting them is a part of the process. Knowingly or unknowingly, you do things that hurt your partner or are deemed insensitive by them. A lot of people get into a tangle when they commit mistakes, and in order to get out of them, they try to lie about mistakes being mistakes. The best relationships are the ones in which responsibility is a maxim, and when it is violated, punishment is given by the partner and when not a reward is on the cards. There is growth at the end of such acceptance. Growth from naive simplicity to profound simplicity.

# 9.  Respect Their No


In relationships when you are so attached to a person, you get affected by whatever they say and do as it is happening to you, you tend to form the attitude that they will never say no to you. This is a line that you should never cross as taking your partner for granted can damage the relationship where they feel you are the dominant one and do not listen to them. Sometimes they won’t be in the mood to do a thing you are excited about so take their no and tell them we will do it when you feel like it.

# 10. Don’t Compare Your Relationships To That Of Others

If you try to replicate the actions of others, pretty soon the shot of having a real identity will be taken away from you. In this world human existence consists of a plethora of examples which help in providing contrast in the society, you do come under the umbrella anyway as something about you will definitely be similar with that of another person. However outright imitation will lead you nowhere as you will think “I should do this like that person” or this like that person to be successful. You were born with characters native to your own personality which are diminished by imitation and accentuated only when you express yourself freely in a relationship. Care, love and affection can come from any heart and are the only thing that should be imitated in a relationship. The rest has to be yours and real.

Let us know what makes you hot with rage in your relationship and what do you do when things get a little overheated. Share your episodes in the comments section below.

(Images Courtesy: 1. Shabar Vashikaran Mantra, 2. Toby's Home, 3. Thought Catalog, 4. Huffington Post, 5. Medimanage: Men's Health (Featured Image)


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