Why you Should NOT Hold any Grudges in a Relationship?

1,379 Views Updated: 02 Feb 2018
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Why you Should NOT Hold any Grudges in a Relationship?

Humans are the most self-preserved creatures on the entire planet, and undoubtedly get hurt very often. That is the time when they want everyone to know and want to hold grudges against their partner who has hurt them. You might think that holding a grudge is valid, but it is actually not.

It takes a lot of guts actually to forgive a person whom you have grudges against. But keeping grudges will never let you be a better person. Let us dive into the reasons why you should not hold any grudges in a relationship.

#1. Grudges Add An Emotional Baggage

Your emotional state is affected by holding onto a grudge. Holding on any grudge affects you more than the people you have a grudge against. There is an emotional baggage that you need to carry wherever you go, if you hold a grudge against your partner. If you do not give up that grudge, you will have to bear that on yourself all the time which is not healthy for your emotional well being. This can act as a huge emotional wreck.

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#2. Grudges Are Like Debts In Your Mind

A grudge is not less than debt. A grudge will weigh your mind, and you won’t be able to give that grudge up until you are over it. Moreover, if your partner does not take notice of this, then it will hurt you even more. If you don’t want your mind to go under depression because of having a mental debt, then give up that grudge right now.

#3. Grudges Make You Upset

Happy people make the other person also happy. Similarly, if you will have something that is bothering you, not just others, you will be upset all the time. Moreover, if you think that grudge is not something you can forgive or forget, then either give up the relationship or if you can’t give up the relationship, give up the grudge. What is the point of holding grudges against someone when it is not even making you happy? This dead weight of those grudges will never allow you to be happy anywhere. As a result, you will also not be able to make the people around you happy.

#4. Grudges Make You Resent Your Partner

If you hold a grudge against your partner for too long, you will slowly start resenting your partner. The worst thing about this situation is that your partner will not be even aware that you are gradually starting to feel annoyed in their presence. This unawareness will just make your relationship even more pathetic. It will be better if you talk to your partner about it and look forward to a solution. Otherwise, it will start eating you from within, and your partner will not even know what they did.

(Read Here: How Not To Sabotage Your Relationship?)

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#5. Grudges Make you Grow Apart

Grudges in a relationship are actually very evil for them. You both will not even realize when you started to grow distant from each other. Grudges will grow indifferences and pain between you both and that will lead to distance between both of you. Grudges are killers in a relationship. Holding on one is the worst for a relationship. Moreover, the chances of having miscommunication increase in this case. It will lead to wrong assumptions and misunderstandings between you two. 

#6. Grudges Hamper Communication

Again, a very major drawback of holding grudges against your partner is that it can eliminate all the possibilities of communication in a relationship. No communication at all will make a dead end for your relationship. Not communicating with each other will just give birth to wrong assumptions. If you have a problem with your partner and not speaking it out, you will directly jump to conclusions. The silence that is the result of grudges and resentment is painful and not healthy for the relationship. 

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#7. Grudges Mess With Your Mental Health

You are bottling up your angry emotions by holding grudges which can take a serious toll on your mental and physical health. Many studies suggest that high level of anger and holding grudges can affect your heart and emotions in a negative manner. The feelings that are repressed may cause an increase in blood pressure. There is a lot of risk on the physical and mental health of a person who represses his or her feelings and holds grudges. Most of the heart problems are caused because of depression and stress which is a result of holding grudges.

Holding on hostile emotions is a root to anger and stress which can manifest something more painful than mental illness. Most importantly, the more you hold a grudge, the less clearly you will be able to think. It is better to talk it out.

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#8. Giving Up A Grudge Will Make You Sleep Better

Instead of tossing your head around because of a grudge, try to calm your mind up. You will turn your mind and heart to stress with anger and grudges. You will never have a peaceful sleep if you have so much in your head. If these grudges keep going on in your life, this resentment will just decrease the quality of your sleep. A premium quality of sleep for a couple of hours is essential in order to have a good health and mental well being. Let go your resentment and grudges and you will see the difference in your overall health in just sometimes. Try to accept the fact mentally that you are going to forgive your partner.  

#9. Forgiveness Is Easier

The feelings and emotions are no maths. However, if you could do the math of feelings and emotions, you would have realized that forgiving is much easier than holding onto a grudge for a long time. You can end things all at once, but if you hold a grudge, it will eat you up entirely from inside. A relationship can never get better if you hold grudges against each other. You can make your relationship stronger and better if you release the grudges behind and focus on moving forward for good. Forgiveness has a sense of humanity which makes you a better person which will work positivity for your relationships well. Forgiveness requires modesty, and you can help yourself and your partner with that. Also, if you will learn to forgive people, you will be a better person in front of them.

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This was our guide on why you shouldn’t hold grudges in your relationship. Let us know your suggestions as well in the comments section below.

(Image Courtesy: 1. Live Science, 2. Whisper, 3. I Believe, 4. Live Strong, 5. Lesleiver: Press Journal(Featured Image Courtesy)

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